Deep in soul
Rita was counting her hairs. She knew that it was not needed but she decided to do it any way. She knew that no one was going to count her hair especially her Boss. He never cared regarding appearance of his subordinate until they were in decent way. Even when some one dressed in wrong way, Boss just gave that one irritating look. But he didn't comment since he said once clearly to one person who claimed regarding over exposing dress of one girl that it was her choice. Her Boss said that he would not give opinion to staff regarding dresses. But still every one just dressed in decent way. Still Rita started arranging her hairs with care. Then she slowly turned towards her dress. She looked at it with care. She was upset when she noticed one thread was missing with design of embroidery. She sensed that she couldn't wear it. She knew that one thread would not do harm but still she felt scared. She needed to be perfect. She started searching for dress. Tushar entered from behind. " Rita you are looking beautiful." " No Tushar stop lying. I am not. Look at this dress that design would look worst on it." Tushar came near her. He started searching for defect. He was so confused. He didn't see any fault in dress. He saw just a beautiful woman who was too much stressed. He just never understand why did his beautiful wife look so much stressed regarding looks. In fact Rita was stressed regarding every thing. He never sensed the cause. She was so beautiful and so talented. She just didn't seem to have any thing less but still she was so upset about every thing. He just kept hoping that one day she would sense it. Tushar " Come on. What is wrong in you? You are so beautiful." Rita felt so nice when he admired her. She looked at mirror. He was right. She was really beautiful girl. She smiled in shy way. Rita decided that she would keep that dress. Rita " You are right. I will wear this dress only." Rita was so pleasant. She decided that she was looking beautiful. She gave sweet smile to Tushar. Tushar was so happy that Rita smiled. He just wanted to retain that smile on her face. He hated when he saw that uncertainty on her face. He wanted to give her blessing of happiness. She was his dream. He just never understood when he fall in love with her so much that he forgot himself totally. He loved the way she trusted him. She was so innocent and beautiful. He just never understood how could any body dislike that beautiful face. She was a angel from god. Rita started smiling softly. She knew that he was in love with her. But she felt that he was lot better than her. She was so scared that one day he would consider her nothing but burden. One day he would hate her. But then she suddenly felt that she didn't want to think about it. She looked at herself again. She was not as beautiful as he claimed. He was just lying. Rita " I am not that beautiful." Tushar saw her smile was vanishing. He wanted to retain it. Tushar " Stop looking in mirror. Just look inside my eyes don't you feel that you are beautiful?" She turned to him and started laughing. She felt so happy and pleased again. Tushar was that gift of god which held her up on even her worst days. She smiled at him. Rita looked at watch. She saw that she was getting late for office. Rita " Come on let's go." Tushar " As you wish." They both went out. Rita started feeling so happy and pleasant. She didn't felt any tension when Tushar was sitting with her in bus. Then Tushar's stop came. He went away. She kept looking at him out of bus window. He was something which she wanted to cherish for entire life. But then she saw vehicles and traffic around him. She was so tense that he might had accident. She kept watching him until he didn't reach to other side of road. Then she took breathe. She was holding her breathe for such a long time that she made noise of relief. She was so confused. She never sensed it. She was getting so much scared now a days. It was so strange.
Tushar was so happy. Rita was looking so happy. He sensed from beginning that Rita was sensitive. He wanted her to be happy. He wanted her to get over sorrows in life. He wanted her to be positive. He wanted to understand cause but she didn't want to share. In fact she just get so much at mention of her expression that he just wanted to reduce tension than asking for cause. He was feeling so happy. He was sure that Rita would be fine today. He never able to guess that as soon as he went out Rita hopes would shatter. He never guessed that she was watching him with care with just one thought that he must not had accident. Rita was so scared. She felt one thing. If something happened to him, her every hope would be shattered. She sensed one thing. She must not feel so much negative. She was feeling so tense on every day. She kept feeling that she must not lose control of her feelings. She started looking ahead. She was so tense. She had one mirror in purse. She started looking inside that mirror. She started searching for fault in her looks. She began to look at her hair style. She started to watch in mirror. She saw different looks in mirror. She started to feel so wonderful on every point. But then she suddenly saw a white hair. She was so scared. Some one might taunt her about it. She didn't want it. She started to try to remove it. While doing this she managed to mess her hair, she started to search for comb. But she didn't find it. She managed to drop her purse. She was so upset now. Her every item was on floor of bus. She started to pick them up. She began to put them in her purse. She began to arrange to it properly. But that bus moved continuously. She began to put every item in purse. She started to arrange them properly in purse. Then soon other passengers started complaining. They were scared that they might fall on her. Few helped her. Finally she had every thing in purse. But by that time her bus stop came. She just had to climb out of bus. She was standing on road. Her office was just ahead on second corner from that bus stop. She decided that she might just sit on seat of bus stop. She began to look in mirror. She started to comb. Finally her hair looked okay. She started walking. She looked in watch. She was going to reach 10 minutes early to office. She was happy to sense it. She didn't want to be late. She started walking fast. When she reached to office, she saw peon opened door. She looked around no one was there. She didn't want to be alone in office. She kept standing in heat. She was feeling so warm. She began to feel it's reaction on her face. She was so confused. She didn't understand what she supposed to do. She went inside office. She started to go near her table. Peon looked at her. She felt that he was criticizing her for coming early. She just went to table. She started working on it. Then that Peon came to her. She just wanted to run away. He asked " Madam do you want tea?" She was confused. She nodded. He went away to bring tea for her. She was so confused. She was even scared of peon. This was strange. She started looking at files on her table. She could see large number of new files. She never understood when she started taking files from every table. Now a days she just kept working. She didn't able to say no to any one. She didn't want to hurt them so number of files on her table kept increasing on every day. She just was getting so exhausted by this. She wanted to reduce this burden. But she couldn't. She was tense some one might get her hurt. She wanted to look perfect. She just never felt relaxed until she didn't complete her files as well as files of few other people. She started working.
When Boss came in, once again Boss noticed Rita's table was full of files. Boss just never understood how did she kept getting files. She worked with so much dedication. She needed to complete her work much before her time. But she was working every day. She was trying hard to complete other people's work. It was really strange. Normally her Boss didn't interfere in other person's business. But today he decided that he must. He went near her. " Rita!!" Rita stood up. She was clearly shivering. He was so confused. He never acted in harsh way with her. He started to sense that she was scared. Boss " Why are you scared so much?" " No..no I am not scared." She started to clean sweat on her forehead. It was clear that she was scared. " I can clearly see there were lot of work on your table which don't belong to you. " She was so confused. She never thought that her Boss would get angry if she did extra work. " I was helping colleagues. I thought it will be nice for office." " No..it is wrong. You are getting over burdened and other people are getting lazy. I don't give them salary just to relax in office. They need to do their work. I want you to stop this." Rita wanted to apologize but words didn't come out of her mouth. She just kept shivering. Boss sensed one thing that something was wrong with her. But he never interfered in her personal life. Boss " I don't want you to see working on other files. Did you understood?" She nodded while shivering. She started to try to control her emotions. But she was so scared. Then Boss went in his cabin. She started to sort others files. She found that all her files were already over. She decided that she would give them back to others. She started waiting for those colleagues. She was upset. She just wanted to get rid of those files. She started to waiting for them. One by one every one started to enter in office. She started giving them back their files. She could see clearly their anger. " How could you do that? If you don't want to complete why did you took it? Now I have to complete it quickly." " You are right. Rita just managed to make our life miserable." Rita started crying slowly. She wanted to make them happy but they were against her. " Now stop pretending. You have managed to make our life miserable. You stupid girl." Rita was so scared. She just didn't understand what did she supposed to do. Another colleague literally started to abuse her. She just went back to table. She was so scared. She took all her things and ran out of office. She started searching for auto. She didn't find one for long time. Then she started walking. She just kept walking in confused way when Tushar called her. She started crying. Tushar " Just relax. Where are you?" Rita " I am worst person in this world. You deserve lot better wife than me. I don't deserve to stay alive." Tushar was so scared when he heard those words. He was eating his lunch. He had to work for whole day. He couldn't just ran after her. But he knew that he could even let her do something wrong. He decided that he would hear screaming of his Boss. " Just stay there. I am coming." Rita was not interested in his words. Rita " I am sorry." She disconnected his call then she switched off her phone. He was so scared. He just ran out of office. All his colleagues were shocked. But he didn't stop anywhere. He just kept running around. He wanted to find his wife as soon as possible. Then his mobile rang. He saw that it was Rita's call. He took it. But it was Police. He told him that this phone belonged to a women who jumped before train. On that point for first time Tushar sensed a strange feeling. He felt as if his soul was not any more in his body. He felt as if he was somewhere else and his soul was somewhere in different places. He kept moving but he felt as if he was no longer part of his body. He went back in office. He told every thing to all his friends. They told him to sit down. He obeyed them like robot. But he was no longer inside his body. He was just one statue. He just kept doing things as per he told. He went to Police station. He cried. But still he didn't feel like part of his body. His soul was different thing and he was moving ahead with his body. Somewhere in his heart he felt this was better because he didn't felt so hurt when he saw body of Rita which was full of blood and in worst condition.
At beginning people used to come in home to visit Tushar. He used to feel okay about it. Since he turned himself in stone, he was firm about it. But one day he saw people from Rita's office. Finally one day Boss came to visit him. Tushar suddenly found his voice " Why did you want to fire her? She was angel." " No I don't want to fire her. In fact I stood with her. " " Regarding what?" Then Boss told him every thing. Tushar was so confused. " But why did she feel so upset about it?" He started to cry slowly. Boss " May be she had some problem?" " What problem?" "Well you know her father." " Her father? He died in accident." " What? who told you this lie?" " Her family told me." " No..no..he committed suicide. After that Rita started to get emotional and scared about every thing. At beginning I thought it was normal. But then slowly I started to feel it was wrong. Still you can understand I can't interfere in her life." " But you could have told me." " I have tried. Once I asked her about you. But she got so scared. She started shivering. I made wrong assumption about you. I thought that you must abusive." Tushar was so shocked. " No..No I love her. I tried to comfort her on every step. But I just sensed one thing. I just couldn't able to do it." Tushar started crying. Then his mother-in-law came near him. She said slowly " It was not your fault. She was like that from beginning. It was due to our situation that she started acting like that." " Situation?" " Her father died. I didn't have any property. His family blamed that suicide on me. They kept saying that I am cause of suicide. Her father was strange man. He never liked watching me to talking any one. He didn't prefer my going out alone. But then one day he didn't able to control his temper when one of his friend watched me. Actually I was cooking in kitchen when this friend came with her father. He supposed to drop him off and go away. But I heard voice of bike. Rita was five year old by then. She just started running out. I don't want her to go on road so I came out to stop her. When I came out, this friend saw my face and gave smile. Her father lost his head started hitting him. Rita started crying. I tried to stop him but nothing worked. Finally when he came to his senses, his friend was died. Every one in neighborhood was watching it with shock. No one expected such incidence in that peaceful locality. Every one was screaming. Some one called Police. Then her father started abusing Rita for it. He wanted to kill her too. But by that time people took hold of him. I was so scared of him. He was no longer that man whom I married. Then Police were called. He went to jail. Inside that jail he started sensing faults. He started calling me. But I didn't want him in my life so I just divorced him. He didn't want to give it. But he had to. Then his case went in court. Judge sent him to mental asylum. His custody of child denied. But any way he made it quiet clear by screaming that he didn't want Rita. He just wanted her dead. He was so horrible. I tried to avoid him. But sometimes he kept calling us. Rita many times took his phones. Then one day I saw her shivering while talking on phone. I suspected something was wrong. I took phone from her. When I heard his voice, I started cursing him. He kept screaming. Then I called Police. Police took him to jail. After that he never came to us. I thought this matter was over." Tushar was shocked. He didn't know all these things. He just never understood Rita. " But it was not over. One day a lawyer came to us and told us that he committed suicide. I told him that I am not interested. But Rita started feeling scared from that day. I tried to convince her that it was over. I thought that marriage took away her fear but it didn't seem to work." Rita's Mother started crying loudly.
Tushar felt so shocked and cheated. He didn't want to see frame of Rita any longer. She lied to him. He started throwing away her things. Boss tried to control him. Rita's Mom kept saying that she lied because she loved him. But he didn't believe it. She liked because she didn't care. She killed herself because she didn't care about him. She never thought about him and he just kept thinking about her. This was all wrong. She never loved him. He sensed one thing. He didn't need her any more. He started to tell every one to get out. He started to throw away her things. He started screaming " She never loved me. I hate her." He just started shouting. Slowly people went out. He went inside his room. He was so upset. He changed his clothes. He wore nice suit. Then he felt it was too much. He wore simple shirt. He went out for walk. Soon every one on road started to look at him. He hated their pity. Few people tried to say they were sorry about his loss. He kept telling them. He didn't care then he decided that he needed another wife. He decided that he should go to marriage bureau. He went there. He gave his photograph. He pretended that he was interested in getting married again. He started telling details. When they started to talk about his wife, he avoided. Then he sat in corner and started writing. When he felt touch of hand on his shoulder, Boss was standing there. Boss sat near him. " What are you doing?" " She never loved me. I wanted some one who love me." " But you loved her, don't you?" Tushar started crying slowly. All people in marriage bureau looked confused. Boss gave that application back which was not filled. He took hold of Tushar's hand and they went out. Boss gave one address. They sat in taxi. Tushar started screaming " I want to get over her." " I know but this is not place which will help you to do that." Then Boss took him in psychiatrist's clinic. Tushar " I am not mad." Boss pointed at other patients. " Ask them all. They never felt that they were mad." Every one nodded in agreement. " So. No one is mad. We are hear just to relax our mind. Now just shut up and sit." But still Tushar kept screaming. Finally Psychiatrist came out. Psychiatrist " What's wrong?" Tushar " I am not mad." " Yes you are right. You are doctor and I am patient so you have some to give treatment to me so wait outside for few moment. Will you do that favor to me?" That Doctor said it in such way that Tushar had to nod. He sat there. He knew now that he was upset. He loved Rita from heart. She lied to him and now she was died. He didn't understand what was his feelings. He started crying slowly. Then finally his number came. Tushar went inside and told every thing to psychiatrist. " So she never loved me." " No that is not problem. Your problem is that you loved her but she didn't give you her faith. She didn't believe in you. You said you went in marriage bureau today. Did you told them that your wife committed suicide?" Tushar was so shocked. Psychiatrist was right. He lied too. He suddenly sensed one thing that Rita was not lying or cheating. She was just too scared to admit like he was today. Suicide was worst thing for every one. No one wanted to admit it so now it all looked more worst to him. She loved him. Tushar " Doctor why did you force this sorrow on me? It should have been better if I believed that she didn't love me." " No since deep down in your soul you know it all." He turned to Boss " Thanks for bringing him here. Don't worry now. I will handle it all. You can go but give number of his some family member." Tushar " I will give number of my Dad." " Great.." Doctor started filling on computer. Boss stood and went away. Doctor said loudly " You are suffering from post traumatic symptoms. You will start your treatment from today." " But what was wrong with Rita?" " That she was dead." Psychiatrist started laughing. Then he looked at Tushar and said " She is dead so she is no longer need my help. Let's discuss about you whom I can help." Tushar nodded and started discussing his thoughts.
The End
Rita was counting her hairs. She knew that it was not needed but she decided to do it any way. She knew that no one was going to count her hair especially her Boss. He never cared regarding appearance of his subordinate until they were in decent way. Even when some one dressed in wrong way, Boss just gave that one irritating look. But he didn't comment since he said once clearly to one person who claimed regarding over exposing dress of one girl that it was her choice. Her Boss said that he would not give opinion to staff regarding dresses. But still every one just dressed in decent way. Still Rita started arranging her hairs with care. Then she slowly turned towards her dress. She looked at it with care. She was upset when she noticed one thread was missing with design of embroidery. She sensed that she couldn't wear it. She knew that one thread would not do harm but still she felt scared. She needed to be perfect. She started searching for dress. Tushar entered from behind. " Rita you are looking beautiful." " No Tushar stop lying. I am not. Look at this dress that design would look worst on it." Tushar came near her. He started searching for defect. He was so confused. He didn't see any fault in dress. He saw just a beautiful woman who was too much stressed. He just never understand why did his beautiful wife look so much stressed regarding looks. In fact Rita was stressed regarding every thing. He never sensed the cause. She was so beautiful and so talented. She just didn't seem to have any thing less but still she was so upset about every thing. He just kept hoping that one day she would sense it. Tushar " Come on. What is wrong in you? You are so beautiful." Rita felt so nice when he admired her. She looked at mirror. He was right. She was really beautiful girl. She smiled in shy way. Rita decided that she would keep that dress. Rita " You are right. I will wear this dress only." Rita was so pleasant. She decided that she was looking beautiful. She gave sweet smile to Tushar. Tushar was so happy that Rita smiled. He just wanted to retain that smile on her face. He hated when he saw that uncertainty on her face. He wanted to give her blessing of happiness. She was his dream. He just never understood when he fall in love with her so much that he forgot himself totally. He loved the way she trusted him. She was so innocent and beautiful. He just never understood how could any body dislike that beautiful face. She was a angel from god. Rita started smiling softly. She knew that he was in love with her. But she felt that he was lot better than her. She was so scared that one day he would consider her nothing but burden. One day he would hate her. But then she suddenly felt that she didn't want to think about it. She looked at herself again. She was not as beautiful as he claimed. He was just lying. Rita " I am not that beautiful." Tushar saw her smile was vanishing. He wanted to retain it. Tushar " Stop looking in mirror. Just look inside my eyes don't you feel that you are beautiful?" She turned to him and started laughing. She felt so happy and pleased again. Tushar was that gift of god which held her up on even her worst days. She smiled at him. Rita looked at watch. She saw that she was getting late for office. Rita " Come on let's go." Tushar " As you wish." They both went out. Rita started feeling so happy and pleasant. She didn't felt any tension when Tushar was sitting with her in bus. Then Tushar's stop came. He went away. She kept looking at him out of bus window. He was something which she wanted to cherish for entire life. But then she saw vehicles and traffic around him. She was so tense that he might had accident. She kept watching him until he didn't reach to other side of road. Then she took breathe. She was holding her breathe for such a long time that she made noise of relief. She was so confused. She never sensed it. She was getting so much scared now a days. It was so strange.
Tushar was so happy. Rita was looking so happy. He sensed from beginning that Rita was sensitive. He wanted her to be happy. He wanted her to get over sorrows in life. He wanted her to be positive. He wanted to understand cause but she didn't want to share. In fact she just get so much at mention of her expression that he just wanted to reduce tension than asking for cause. He was feeling so happy. He was sure that Rita would be fine today. He never able to guess that as soon as he went out Rita hopes would shatter. He never guessed that she was watching him with care with just one thought that he must not had accident. Rita was so scared. She felt one thing. If something happened to him, her every hope would be shattered. She sensed one thing. She must not feel so much negative. She was feeling so tense on every day. She kept feeling that she must not lose control of her feelings. She started looking ahead. She was so tense. She had one mirror in purse. She started looking inside that mirror. She started searching for fault in her looks. She began to look at her hair style. She started to watch in mirror. She saw different looks in mirror. She started to feel so wonderful on every point. But then she suddenly saw a white hair. She was so scared. Some one might taunt her about it. She didn't want it. She started to try to remove it. While doing this she managed to mess her hair, she started to search for comb. But she didn't find it. She managed to drop her purse. She was so upset now. Her every item was on floor of bus. She started to pick them up. She began to put them in her purse. She began to arrange to it properly. But that bus moved continuously. She began to put every item in purse. She started to arrange them properly in purse. Then soon other passengers started complaining. They were scared that they might fall on her. Few helped her. Finally she had every thing in purse. But by that time her bus stop came. She just had to climb out of bus. She was standing on road. Her office was just ahead on second corner from that bus stop. She decided that she might just sit on seat of bus stop. She began to look in mirror. She started to comb. Finally her hair looked okay. She started walking. She looked in watch. She was going to reach 10 minutes early to office. She was happy to sense it. She didn't want to be late. She started walking fast. When she reached to office, she saw peon opened door. She looked around no one was there. She didn't want to be alone in office. She kept standing in heat. She was feeling so warm. She began to feel it's reaction on her face. She was so confused. She didn't understand what she supposed to do. She went inside office. She started to go near her table. Peon looked at her. She felt that he was criticizing her for coming early. She just went to table. She started working on it. Then that Peon came to her. She just wanted to run away. He asked " Madam do you want tea?" She was confused. She nodded. He went away to bring tea for her. She was so confused. She was even scared of peon. This was strange. She started looking at files on her table. She could see large number of new files. She never understood when she started taking files from every table. Now a days she just kept working. She didn't able to say no to any one. She didn't want to hurt them so number of files on her table kept increasing on every day. She just was getting so exhausted by this. She wanted to reduce this burden. But she couldn't. She was tense some one might get her hurt. She wanted to look perfect. She just never felt relaxed until she didn't complete her files as well as files of few other people. She started working.
When Boss came in, once again Boss noticed Rita's table was full of files. Boss just never understood how did she kept getting files. She worked with so much dedication. She needed to complete her work much before her time. But she was working every day. She was trying hard to complete other people's work. It was really strange. Normally her Boss didn't interfere in other person's business. But today he decided that he must. He went near her. " Rita!!" Rita stood up. She was clearly shivering. He was so confused. He never acted in harsh way with her. He started to sense that she was scared. Boss " Why are you scared so much?" " No..no I am not scared." She started to clean sweat on her forehead. It was clear that she was scared. " I can clearly see there were lot of work on your table which don't belong to you. " She was so confused. She never thought that her Boss would get angry if she did extra work. " I was helping colleagues. I thought it will be nice for office." " No..it is wrong. You are getting over burdened and other people are getting lazy. I don't give them salary just to relax in office. They need to do their work. I want you to stop this." Rita wanted to apologize but words didn't come out of her mouth. She just kept shivering. Boss sensed one thing that something was wrong with her. But he never interfered in her personal life. Boss " I don't want you to see working on other files. Did you understood?" She nodded while shivering. She started to try to control her emotions. But she was so scared. Then Boss went in his cabin. She started to sort others files. She found that all her files were already over. She decided that she would give them back to others. She started waiting for those colleagues. She was upset. She just wanted to get rid of those files. She started to waiting for them. One by one every one started to enter in office. She started giving them back their files. She could see clearly their anger. " How could you do that? If you don't want to complete why did you took it? Now I have to complete it quickly." " You are right. Rita just managed to make our life miserable." Rita started crying slowly. She wanted to make them happy but they were against her. " Now stop pretending. You have managed to make our life miserable. You stupid girl." Rita was so scared. She just didn't understand what did she supposed to do. Another colleague literally started to abuse her. She just went back to table. She was so scared. She took all her things and ran out of office. She started searching for auto. She didn't find one for long time. Then she started walking. She just kept walking in confused way when Tushar called her. She started crying. Tushar " Just relax. Where are you?" Rita " I am worst person in this world. You deserve lot better wife than me. I don't deserve to stay alive." Tushar was so scared when he heard those words. He was eating his lunch. He had to work for whole day. He couldn't just ran after her. But he knew that he could even let her do something wrong. He decided that he would hear screaming of his Boss. " Just stay there. I am coming." Rita was not interested in his words. Rita " I am sorry." She disconnected his call then she switched off her phone. He was so scared. He just ran out of office. All his colleagues were shocked. But he didn't stop anywhere. He just kept running around. He wanted to find his wife as soon as possible. Then his mobile rang. He saw that it was Rita's call. He took it. But it was Police. He told him that this phone belonged to a women who jumped before train. On that point for first time Tushar sensed a strange feeling. He felt as if his soul was not any more in his body. He felt as if he was somewhere else and his soul was somewhere in different places. He kept moving but he felt as if he was no longer part of his body. He went back in office. He told every thing to all his friends. They told him to sit down. He obeyed them like robot. But he was no longer inside his body. He was just one statue. He just kept doing things as per he told. He went to Police station. He cried. But still he didn't feel like part of his body. His soul was different thing and he was moving ahead with his body. Somewhere in his heart he felt this was better because he didn't felt so hurt when he saw body of Rita which was full of blood and in worst condition.
At beginning people used to come in home to visit Tushar. He used to feel okay about it. Since he turned himself in stone, he was firm about it. But one day he saw people from Rita's office. Finally one day Boss came to visit him. Tushar suddenly found his voice " Why did you want to fire her? She was angel." " No I don't want to fire her. In fact I stood with her. " " Regarding what?" Then Boss told him every thing. Tushar was so confused. " But why did she feel so upset about it?" He started to cry slowly. Boss " May be she had some problem?" " What problem?" "Well you know her father." " Her father? He died in accident." " What? who told you this lie?" " Her family told me." " No..no..he committed suicide. After that Rita started to get emotional and scared about every thing. At beginning I thought it was normal. But then slowly I started to feel it was wrong. Still you can understand I can't interfere in her life." " But you could have told me." " I have tried. Once I asked her about you. But she got so scared. She started shivering. I made wrong assumption about you. I thought that you must abusive." Tushar was so shocked. " No..No I love her. I tried to comfort her on every step. But I just sensed one thing. I just couldn't able to do it." Tushar started crying. Then his mother-in-law came near him. She said slowly " It was not your fault. She was like that from beginning. It was due to our situation that she started acting like that." " Situation?" " Her father died. I didn't have any property. His family blamed that suicide on me. They kept saying that I am cause of suicide. Her father was strange man. He never liked watching me to talking any one. He didn't prefer my going out alone. But then one day he didn't able to control his temper when one of his friend watched me. Actually I was cooking in kitchen when this friend came with her father. He supposed to drop him off and go away. But I heard voice of bike. Rita was five year old by then. She just started running out. I don't want her to go on road so I came out to stop her. When I came out, this friend saw my face and gave smile. Her father lost his head started hitting him. Rita started crying. I tried to stop him but nothing worked. Finally when he came to his senses, his friend was died. Every one in neighborhood was watching it with shock. No one expected such incidence in that peaceful locality. Every one was screaming. Some one called Police. Then her father started abusing Rita for it. He wanted to kill her too. But by that time people took hold of him. I was so scared of him. He was no longer that man whom I married. Then Police were called. He went to jail. Inside that jail he started sensing faults. He started calling me. But I didn't want him in my life so I just divorced him. He didn't want to give it. But he had to. Then his case went in court. Judge sent him to mental asylum. His custody of child denied. But any way he made it quiet clear by screaming that he didn't want Rita. He just wanted her dead. He was so horrible. I tried to avoid him. But sometimes he kept calling us. Rita many times took his phones. Then one day I saw her shivering while talking on phone. I suspected something was wrong. I took phone from her. When I heard his voice, I started cursing him. He kept screaming. Then I called Police. Police took him to jail. After that he never came to us. I thought this matter was over." Tushar was shocked. He didn't know all these things. He just never understood Rita. " But it was not over. One day a lawyer came to us and told us that he committed suicide. I told him that I am not interested. But Rita started feeling scared from that day. I tried to convince her that it was over. I thought that marriage took away her fear but it didn't seem to work." Rita's Mother started crying loudly.
Tushar felt so shocked and cheated. He didn't want to see frame of Rita any longer. She lied to him. He started throwing away her things. Boss tried to control him. Rita's Mom kept saying that she lied because she loved him. But he didn't believe it. She liked because she didn't care. She killed herself because she didn't care about him. She never thought about him and he just kept thinking about her. This was all wrong. She never loved him. He sensed one thing. He didn't need her any more. He started to tell every one to get out. He started to throw away her things. He started screaming " She never loved me. I hate her." He just started shouting. Slowly people went out. He went inside his room. He was so upset. He changed his clothes. He wore nice suit. Then he felt it was too much. He wore simple shirt. He went out for walk. Soon every one on road started to look at him. He hated their pity. Few people tried to say they were sorry about his loss. He kept telling them. He didn't care then he decided that he needed another wife. He decided that he should go to marriage bureau. He went there. He gave his photograph. He pretended that he was interested in getting married again. He started telling details. When they started to talk about his wife, he avoided. Then he sat in corner and started writing. When he felt touch of hand on his shoulder, Boss was standing there. Boss sat near him. " What are you doing?" " She never loved me. I wanted some one who love me." " But you loved her, don't you?" Tushar started crying slowly. All people in marriage bureau looked confused. Boss gave that application back which was not filled. He took hold of Tushar's hand and they went out. Boss gave one address. They sat in taxi. Tushar started screaming " I want to get over her." " I know but this is not place which will help you to do that." Then Boss took him in psychiatrist's clinic. Tushar " I am not mad." Boss pointed at other patients. " Ask them all. They never felt that they were mad." Every one nodded in agreement. " So. No one is mad. We are hear just to relax our mind. Now just shut up and sit." But still Tushar kept screaming. Finally Psychiatrist came out. Psychiatrist " What's wrong?" Tushar " I am not mad." " Yes you are right. You are doctor and I am patient so you have some to give treatment to me so wait outside for few moment. Will you do that favor to me?" That Doctor said it in such way that Tushar had to nod. He sat there. He knew now that he was upset. He loved Rita from heart. She lied to him and now she was died. He didn't understand what was his feelings. He started crying slowly. Then finally his number came. Tushar went inside and told every thing to psychiatrist. " So she never loved me." " No that is not problem. Your problem is that you loved her but she didn't give you her faith. She didn't believe in you. You said you went in marriage bureau today. Did you told them that your wife committed suicide?" Tushar was so shocked. Psychiatrist was right. He lied too. He suddenly sensed one thing that Rita was not lying or cheating. She was just too scared to admit like he was today. Suicide was worst thing for every one. No one wanted to admit it so now it all looked more worst to him. She loved him. Tushar " Doctor why did you force this sorrow on me? It should have been better if I believed that she didn't love me." " No since deep down in your soul you know it all." He turned to Boss " Thanks for bringing him here. Don't worry now. I will handle it all. You can go but give number of his some family member." Tushar " I will give number of my Dad." " Great.." Doctor started filling on computer. Boss stood and went away. Doctor said loudly " You are suffering from post traumatic symptoms. You will start your treatment from today." " But what was wrong with Rita?" " That she was dead." Psychiatrist started laughing. Then he looked at Tushar and said " She is dead so she is no longer need my help. Let's discuss about you whom I can help." Tushar nodded and started discussing his thoughts.
The End
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