Ragini's threat
Ragini was waiting in line for long time. She was working so hard to get this appointment. She was so scared. She was so confused. She needed an appointment. She didn’t understand what was happening to her. She kept feeling so scared. She wanted some help from legal level. She didn’t like the way things were moving. Ragini started job in one company. She was working properly but now she felt as if they wanted to fire her. She could sense it. She began to remember how did she asked for file to Chetan. He used to work on computer for hours. It was important for her. She needed those documents to complete her project. Her project was precious to her. She really desired success in this project. She wanted help from all. But it was not happening. She was feeling so tense about everything. She needed to find some way to get it done. That was first time when Chetan told her. She still remembered that day like yesterday. Chetan always used to talk sweetly with her. Sometimes she felt that Chetan liked her. She felt that he might even propose her. She knew that she was not interested but still. He was so sweet with her. He used to do all before she could demand. In fact few times he even did somethings extra. She was so stressed when she started to her job. She was new & her Boss kept ordering her to do work. Chetan was helping her so much. She still remembered those days but now all was changed. Chetan was not interested in her. She saw him talking with other woman Priti. Priti was not so pretty. She kept telling herself but she knew that Priti was enough pretty to impress boy. She didn’t want to marry Chetan so it was okay if he started dating Priti but he was not doing work which she needed. It was important to do that work. Ragini was just concerned about her work. Then slowly she sensed other colleagues of office were not helping her too. They were just pretending that they would help. But it was not enough. She saw it. She knew that they were planning something. She wanted to discuss to lawyer about her situation legally. She needed to protect her job at any cost. But she knew that she was not permanent. She was so sure that they were planning to bring someone else. She was waiting in line. But after sometime Receptionist asked “ What is your case?” “ I don’t have case?” He gave her strange look. “ You are in lawyer’s office so you must have some case! Ohh you want to start case.” “ No…no l want to discuss something.” “ Okay. I will call Sir talk to him on phone.” She nodded. Lawyer talked very nicely. But when she began to explain her situation, lawyer said “ I can give you appointment but I need to charge for it & frankly I don’t see any legal issue in your situation. If they fire you from job then come to me I will handle it.” She felt so nervous but she knew that she needed this Lawyer. “ Okay Sir but can’t you stop them from doing it?” “ But they haven’t done anything to suggest it! Your Boss might make you permanent. Just give it sometime. Okay..bye.” Clearly Lawyer lost patience with her & disconnected. Next client came who immediately gave legal issue & went inside. She felt so sad. She was working so hard for this appointment. It seemed totally useless. She watched in room. Next client was last so it was not about time. She felt that she needed to wait. She just decided to go home. Her home was empty like. She liked it that way. She didn’t want anyone to interfere in her life. She wanted to feel happy about it. She felt other people would just provide negativity. She didn’t want them in her life. She wanted to feel positive from her thoughts. It was important for her. She laughed at her positive thoughts. She knew that she was laughing alone but there was no one to taunt her. She spent her entire life under taunts. Her mother died then her father remarried. She kept trying to good before her step mother but it was never enough. Her step mother was not cruel to her. But her step mother was always frustrated with situation. Her step mother married her Dad with hope of marrying a rich man but her Dad was not so rich. Actually her step mother was fooled by her own family since they just wanted to get rid of one daughter. Her step mother kept telling Ragini that daughter was nothing but burden. Her step mother was so frustrated when she gave birth to her first child & it was girl. Her step mother cried. Her step mother never showed any affection towards her daughter & it was totally wrong. Her step mother treated her step sister in worst way. It was so horrible. She still didn’t want to remember memories of that baby crying continuously. She told herself that it was over. Her Dad died & her step mother was living separately. Her step sisters were living with her. She no longer connected to them. She was feeling so sad about entire thing. She didn’t want to feel concerned about her step sisters. Her Step mother made it clear to her. Her Step mother told her on her Dad’s funeral. “ Ragini I gave you this amount but you must give up rights on house of your birth & childhood.” Ragini was desperate on that point to buy her house so she just asked for money & then she bought this house. It was perfect & empty. She always wanted one empty house & she got it. She sat peacefully in it. Then she went in kitchen. She had some juice stored. She made it by herself with help of juicer. She wanted to relax herself after long discussions with lawyer which actually didn’t happen. But she decided to drink juice anyway. Sometimes she felt as if she needed to start drinking some drinks like her step mother! Her step mother had big cabinet full of different types of wines & many other drinks. She never touched it. But her Dad & her step mother used to enjoy them. She disliked it after watching her step mother drank it. She hated everything which reminded her of step mother. But now she got over it. She might need to start drinking. She was so confused. She was so tense. She knew very well how to make nice drink. She saw them making since childhood. But she didn’t want to try. She was so nervous. She wanted to remain positive. She decided to go for juice & started drinking it peacefully. Then she needed to eat. She was not hungry but she started to eat anyway. She sensed odd sort of nausea but she still kept eating without stopping. She felt so sad. She needed help of that lawyer. Finally she washed her dishes & went to sleep. She didn’t understand what she could do next day in office. She was so scared.
Ragini woke up next morning. She was so tense that someone might have followed her in room of advocate. She began to feel scared that she started to feel one thing. She did big mistake by going there. First that Advocate was not willing to help her at all. Now she began to feel so upset by all that was happening. She started to get ready for office. She managed to create one special smile for all. She didn’t want any of them to think what she did. She told herself that she was going to act most nicely. She went to Chetan & asked him sweetly “ How are you?” Chetan didn’t even turn to look towards her. He was too busy. She began to get tense so she moved to next desk. She was so committed to start chatting that she started chatting with woman who didn’t know her. That woman began to get frustrated. But she kept smiling. Ragini was so tense. Ragini wanted to appear normal. Then finally Ragini went to another desk where she wanted file. That man immediately said “ I kept it ready from morning only but you were busy in chatting.” She felt so nervous. She thanked him & went back to her computer. She opened folder & all files were ready. So all had completed work. She sensed that they planned all against her with intention. She felt so scared. She looked around. She felt as if they all were watching her but they were not. They were busy in their own work. It was important for them to do that work. She didn’t understand why she felt as if they were paying so much attention to her? She was not so important. She laughed at her childish thought & then she began work on her project. She got totally involved in it. She didn’t stop working until finally security came. Security tapped on her Desk loudly. With sort of angry look he pointed towards time. “ Madam don’t you want to go home? Your family must be waiting.” She just gave weak smile. No one was waiting for her & she was totally happy about it. She said “ Ohh.. I was so lost in work.” Then she sensed that she even forgot to eat her lunch. She looked towards tiffin. She didn’t have any issue. She didn’t need to cook dinner now. She smiled happily. She said “ I am really sorry” & immediately she took all her things. Then she went away. As always her car was standing outside. She preferred to drive herself. It managed to make her more confident. She didn’t trust anyone’s driving. It was better to drive by herself. She kept feeling nervous about driving too. Today she was panicking on every move. She wanted to feel confident in her soul. She didn’t want to feel confused in her mind. She needed to keep her thoughts on track. She told herself that she was driving so it was safe. She started to imagine her life positively. She wanted to feel happy about all. But she was stressed. She didn’t understand what was her fear. Then she noticed one red colour car behind her. She began to observe it. She felt that it was moving in strange way towards her. She began to feel certain that this driver was following her. She was so stressed. She knew that she was imagining but then on other thought she felt so sure that it was following. Then finally she decided that she didn’t need to worry. She could stop car & let that car pass ahead. It always worked. But then she suddenly felt so scared. What if that car driver came out & tried to harm her. She didn’t have any weapon with her. She suddenly remembered that knife which she kept in driving seat for safety. She smiled. She was always prepared for every situation & she felt that this was that situation. She slowly went to corner & stopped her car. She took out knife. Then she waited that car overtake her car then that car slowed. She was expecting driver to stop & come out. Instead that car took left turn & drove away. She took breath of relief. She knew that this driver was just in hurry. She once again sit inside her car & drove away. After that road was entirely normal. She smiled to herself. She didn’t understand how did her life became such suspense film. She was not working on any secret project. She laughed at that thought which suggested her that they planned to kill her. They could fire her in no time. She was no body so no one was planning to kill her. She felt so nervous by everything. She didn’t understand she kept feeling nervous. She knew that no one was going to kill her. But she kept feeling that it might happen. She didn’t understand why. She laughed once again at her thought. She didn’t sense that she was laughing to herself. She felt that sometimes people did that. Then she slowly began to talk “ Why anyone will kill me? It’s nonsense.. I am imagining things.” She was talking this loudly. It was loud enough for any one to hear. But she knew that no one was there so it was okay. She didn’t care for cars which were passing. She didn’t sense her voice was getting louder. She was too loud. People inside other cars were watching her with shock while driving. She was lost in her dreamworld where she was only one who lived. She was so happy in her thoughts. Slowly she sat back in car. She started driving nothing wrong happened. She finally reached to her home. She sat peacefully. She managed to heat her food in microwave. Then she sat before TV. She knew that she was alone & it was perfect for her. She could talk to herself or do whatever she wanted. She was free to follow her thoughts. She began to think again about entire day. She began to think that what actually had happened. She needed to feel positive about thought. She knew that they wanted to target her. She knew that she needed to find help. She needed to do something. She took appointment of lawyer but he didn’t help. Then suddenly she got another idea. She could talk with Cops. But what she could do or say. She didn’t understand. She began to talk. She was talking so loudly that her voice was coming out of balcony door which she left open by mistake.
Nilima was sitting in garden while her children were playing. She was enjoying nature. She was observing trees & flowers. It was so pleasant to watch them for hours. She loved it. Then she suddenly began to hear voices. She didn’t recognise voice then after sometime she sensed that it was coming from Ragini’s flat. Nilima always managed to hear even smallest voice & she was admired for it. Nilima was so confused. Nilima knew that Ragini lived alone. But then she thought that Ragini might had some visitor or guest. It was possible. Nilima soon sensed that voices were of just one lady who was talking to herself. Nilima shivered. She couldn’t believe it. Ragini was not her friend but still as neighbour she felt concerned. Nilima slowly turned towards window. She could see clearly on glass there was just one figure. Nilima looked towards her kids. They were playing happily. She could tell watchman to pay attention & go. She stood up & about to go towards Watchman when suddenly Watchman came towards her & said with serious expression “Do you hear it? She keeps talking like that whole time. I think she is losing her mind.” Nilima laughed. Nilima “ She might be practising for some play or role.” Watchman joined in laugh. Watchman “ Thank God I didn’t know. She is actress.” “ Hey! Don’t assume such big thing. I mean some small play for office etc.” “ Yes..yes possible.” “But still I talk with her. It looks odd.” Watchman nodded. She pointed towards kids & said “ Pay full attention to them.” Watchman nodded. Nilima slowly went towards flat. She suddenly began to feel that she might be meeting some mad woman not actress. Since those words were not something like dialogue of play. They seemed like person talking to herself. It was so upsetting. She decided to ring doorbell. Nilima rang it. Ragini suddenly came to her senses. She was talking to herself for time & it was not good news. She needed to reduce it. “ But this isn’t madness. I am fine.” Ragini said. Ragini was still talking to herself. She didn’t want to but she couldn’t help. She didn’t trust anyone. Then she heard voice of woman. That woman was asking “ Ragini are you in home?” Answer was yes but she didn’t want to give it. She was so scared. She didn’t trust anyone. Finally they all kept trying to hurt her. Ragini knew it from her heart. It was very risky. But she needed to open door. She didn’t have much option. Nilima was standing outside. She didn’t remember Nilima’s face. She slowly asked “ What do you want?” Nilima gave nervous smile & said “ I heard voices from your house. Do you have guests?” Nilima wanted to say something different but it all came out totally different from her mouth. Ragini said “ No. I am talking to myself. It’s my habit. Bye.” She immediately closed door. She felt so angry. Ragini didn’t understand why couldn’t she talk to herself peacefully too. She suddenly began to cry. She didn’t feel that it was normal anymore. She started to feel so sad & nervous. She looked around for hope. But she saw nothing. Someone was trying to hurt her. Now she felt as if she was on that point where she liked to be got killed. It was most pleasant feeling to her thoughts. She suddenly began to think about suicide. Instead of getting killed by others she might choose some pleasant way to kill her self. It was wonderful thought. She started to remember all those ways in which she could finish all. She was stressed. But then suddenly her door started knocking again. She heard Nilima’s voice from outside. She opened door. Nilima gave nervous smile & said “ It’s not odd to have habit to talk to yourself but you must keep that door close otherwise our watchman kept getting disturbed. I mean he felt as if someone came in building. Ragini felt so stressed & upset. She tried to control her fears but it was not working. She felt totally nervous. Ragini slowly looked towards Nilima. Ragini decided to trust her. Ragini called her inside & started telling all step by step. Nilima listened & said “ I feel they are not trying to kill you. They are jealous of you.” She gave odd smile. Nilima “ Can I tell you something?..” “ Yes.” “ I feel your fight is long you are looking so depressed. If you want to fight back you need strength.” Ragini nodded. First time someone understood her. Ragini “ I feel so sad. I just want to kill myself..” “ That’s what they want you to do! You need to take help of Psychiatrist to fight it.” Ragini was shocked. “ I don’t have mental issues.” “ I know. But still you need to training to fight back.” Ragini was so desperate. She just agreed. Nilima took appointment for her of next week. Ragini suddenly said “ I need to talk with my sister first.” Nilima said “ Ohh great.” Nilima sensed that she needed to take kids back in home so she said bye & went away. Ragini felt so angry. She knew that Nilima was send by them too. Nilima wanted to prove her mad. She was not going to that Psychiatrist. She returned to project. But whole time she was looking behind her. She was shivering with fear. She knew that she needed help. She suddenly remembered lawyer. When she tried to talk with him, Lawyer said in dry voice “ Madam you don’t need Lawyer you need Psychiatrist for your mental issues.” She didn’t say anything. She kept quiet for sometime. Then she said “ I got appointment of next week.” Lawyer said “ Good for you.” & Lawyer disconnected call. Ragini sensed one thing now. She needed to keep this appointment. She needed to do this.
Entire week Ragini kept feeling suspicious. But she tried her best to appear normal. She kept working so hard that on day of appointment Boss easily gave her half day. She went there alone. She needed Nilima with her. Then she came before time & began to talk with everyone, She wanted to confirm if someone mentioned her or Nilima. No one seemed interested in her. In fact there were irritated by her inquiries. Finally one Nurse asked her whose patient she was. When she told name of Doctor, Nurse said “ Do you like one early appointment?” She agreed. This way no one could plan anything against her. Then that Nurse told something on phone. She couldn’t hear it but Nurse came back & said “ They will call you in five minutes.” She was so happy. She went to Psychiatrist & she started telling all. He listened carefully. Then he asked a lot about her life. She kept telling all. She felt so relaxed then finally she stopped discussing. Psychiatrist said “ Due to troubles in your life or due to genetic issues you developed paranoid disorder. In it you feel suspicious of everything.” She slowly asked “ Can you cure me?” Psychiatrist “ In psychology you need to cure yourself. You need to decide I just guide you. Are you ready?” She smiled & said with confidence “ I am.” On that day she began her journey with same hope & spirit.
The End
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