Effects on mind
Satish began to look out of car window. Once again he was stuck in traffic. He was so frustrated. He started to listen to music. Then he suddenly noticed beggar. He came to his car window and started begging. It always managed to confuse him. He felt sympathy but cops always warned against giving money. Cops said this started business of begging. In few cases even kids were kidnapped and damaged physically to get better money just by remembering those cases he started to shiver. He didn't understand how could anyone act so cruel with kid. After all everyone had soft corner for kids. But few people were so cruel. He decided to avoid every beggar. He kept listening to music. He didn't want to get confused. Then he suddenly sensed that this beggar was not going away. He kept hitting his window glass. Satish was so upset. He turned towards window glass. He was so confused. He didn't recognise that beggar but he was hitting on his car window glass like mad man. He shivered. He might be mad man. He knew that he couldn't break that window glass. He started look around for help. But he was shocked when he sensed that no one was watching towards him. It was impossible. Since if this fellow was making so much noise, people couldn't ignore it. He was so confused. He looked back at that beggar. He was smiling in strange way towards him now. He shivered. He didn't understand. Then he started to hear horns from behind. Cars which were standing behind started to get impatient. He wanted to talk with that beggar but it was not possible. He needed to drive so he put his feet on accelerator and his car took speed. He went ahead in full speed. But he kept observing for that beggar. He soon sensed that this beggar was vanished. He didn't understand why did he felt so disturbed by this beggar. He decided that it was not important. He must ignore that entire incidence from his thoughts. He began to concentrate on his breathing. He heard once on TV show by Doctor that it would help person to relax so he started doing it. But soon he sensed that his breathing was too fast. He began to feel more scared by concentrating on it. He needed to relax and fast breathing couldn't relax person. He started to change music. He began to search for some music which could relax his mind but nothing seemed to be working. He kept changing radio station one after another. But nothing was providing peace to his mind. He kept feeling frustrated. He was so upset. He needed to find some way to relax himself. He didn't understand why one beggar managed to scare him so much. He was so stressed. He began console himself. It was reaction of moment. It was over now. Soon he began to think about his house and his family. Sarika was such beautiful woman. He was so lucky to have her as wife. She was mother of two kids but still she looked so nice. She managed to get some weight but it was not reducing her beauty. She was still looking so beautiful. He kept watching her every day as if he was watching her for first time. He was still in deep love with her. He knew that he was not enough for her. He tried his best. Sarika was so accommodative. She never complained. She always adjusted on every front. He could sense that she didn't get things as per her wishes. But she never said anything directly. She always kept admiring every thing in positive way. He was so sure that he married to perfect woman. His life was so perfect. But then suddenly he began to feel tense. He began to sense that he must forgot something. It was so upsetting. He didn't remember what was it. He knew that it was important. He was reading something so important. He needed to talk about it with someone. But he started to get confused. He didn't understand with whom he was supposed to discuss matter. He didn't like how could he forget it something while still feeling he must remember it. He didn't understand why did he felt so strange. He never sensed like that before. First this was happening with him. It was so wrong. Then he saw call of his secretary. He stopped his car in corner. She started discussing about some official meeting. Now he remembered this perfectly. He started prompting her on mobile about actions she supposed to do. She wrote it down and finally she said " Sir you have such a great memory. I mean you did all without reading any details. I have all them in memory." He was so happy but then he got confused. He didn't remember few incidences. He didn't like it. He began to feel so uneasy. He said " But from morning I don't remember something. I kept thinking about that thing." She said " It's okay. Sometimes such things happen. Next time you should wrote down." " Actually I have such good memory that I never needed to wrote down." " But if you give too much stress to yourself, you will suffer effect of it." He nodded and agreed. He began to feel so convinced that he needed to relax himself. He sensed something was wrong with him. He needed to remember all. He began to get upset. He started to console himself everything was fine. But he knew that he was missing something. He kept remembering beggar. He didn't understand what was wrong. He looked around. He saw once again weather was turning rainy. He decided to avoid shortcut during rain. He didn't want his car to get stuck on muddy road. He kept trying his best to keep his car in shape. But due to rain it was getting damaged every day. He knew going on main road would help at least little bit. He started to turn towards main road. He began to drive slowly. He was always so careful about car. He didn't want any damages to it. Then he looked at time. He began to drive fast. He needed to drive ahead as soon as possible. He kept driving with hope that it wouldn't damage car. Due to rain road were getting worst. Finally he reached to office. He took breath of relief. He was finally managing to drive perfectly on those road. Last time he managed to escape from little accident. He started to remember it but suddenly he sensed that it slipped out of his memory. He didn't understand what was wrong. He looked at office. He immediately went inside it.
Satish began to study all files. He remembered all regarding office work. He was good in it. But he couldn't change business environment. He could clearly see decrease in product sell. But he was planning to manage to compensate it by reduction in production. But he was scared that next step of survival might not be good one. They needed to reduce staff!! But he decided that if they didn't recruite for something then they might not need to reduce staff. He was so tense. It was not easy. They couldn't keep paying large salary to senior staff if they kept getting reduction in sell. It was so scary situation. He was thinking about it when his secretary Tina entered. Tina "Sir do you want tea?" Satish smiled and nodded. Tina was beautiful and smart girl. When she joined company and he took her as secretary, everyone was expecting some affair from them. But such thing never happened. They kept laughing on staff for that sort of day dream. They were happy with respective spouse so why should they feel this need? In fact Satish never understood how could happily married person cheat his wife? In fact as per his thinking even unhappily married person should get divorce before doing such drastic things. But in this world people always thought in their way and many times he didn't understand them. Satish understood it long ago so he kept away from that kind of argument. He didn't understand those views but they were personal matter so none of his business. But he never had that sort of relationship with Tina. Tina always managed his every thing in motherly way. Soon staff started calling her Boss's baby sitter and they both felt that felt lot better than to be considered girl friend. Tina kept taking care of his habits. He never said no to her any suggestion of eating. But today he started to feel upset. He didn't want to increase his acidity so he decided to skip tea. He said " No. I don't want tea today." Tina smiled and said " Sir one cup of tea will not increase your acidity. I will keep it mild. Your acidity is increasing due to this tension. You need to take it easy." Satish nodded. He knew that she was right. He needed to reduce tension not just eating habits. Satish " Okay bring that tea but keep it light. It might not cause of acidity but it surely ease it.." Tina nodded and went away. He returned to his work. Then his mobile started to rang. He saw that it was call from Sarika. He took it. Sarika " So what is your decision?!!" " About what?!!" She suddenly didn't speak anything. Then after sometime she said " About our relationship?!!" He was confused. He didn't understand what she was talking about. Satish " What about it? Is this some kind of joke Sarika?! You know very well I don't like this type of jokes." Sarika didn't spoke for sometime. Then she said " If you prefer to ignore it then that will be okay too. After all I don't want to distrub kids." He didn't understand anything. Satish " I don't understand what did you mean?" She gave forced laugh and said " Nothing. Bye" " Bye..and don't cook any spicy for dinner I am feeling little bit acidic." Sarika didn't say anything for long time then she agreed. He disconnected call and he started thinking. He still didn't understand what did he managed to forget. He was so upset. He needed to remember it but it was totally lost from his mind. It was not right. He knew now that it was something about his relationship with Sarika. He was so shocked that he managed to forget such a important thing. But it seemed that he managed. It was so wrong and unfair. He needed to adjust with situation. He started to think about his work. He couldn't concentrate properly and his acidity was so increased. He felt that he might needed to visit Doctor. But he knew that it was useless as long as he kept getting tense nothing would help. Those medicines just reduced it for few hours. He needed to keep relaxed for sometime. He started to concentrate on his breath again. It was only trick that he felt do some good to him. All other tricks were useless. He began to concentrate on his work again. He needed to do his best. He began to plan again. He did everything as best as he could. He had made plans to increase sales. It was important. Suddenly he started to feel restless. He began to check for temperature. His head was not hot. He didn't understand why did he started to feel so restless. He needed to sense why he was feeling sick. He knew that it was something strange. He began to concentrate on work again. He sensed that it was helping little bit. But it was not working as much as he wanted. He was feeling so helpless. He needed to work but he was feeling sick. It was not right. He needed to understand why did he started to feel so much uneasiness in his body. He knew that he was not sick. He confirmed it by touching his forehead. Then he decided that he might visit Doctor to confirm he was fine. He called Tina. " Tina will you take appointment of Doctor for me today?" Tina began to sound concerned. " Are you alright?" " I am feeling little bit uneasy. I feel that it was better to see Doctor." " Do you need emergency appointment?" He laughed and said " No..no I don't feel that bad. I will be fine just need to see what is wrong with me? I feel either acidity or common cold. I don't see anything unusual." Tina sounded relaxed. Tina " I will take appointment of 6 o'clock." "Perfect!!" Then he disconnected call. He returned to work but today he was not doing his work upto the mark. Something was wrong with him. He kept drinking water with hope that it would solve problem but nothing was helping him. He was still sick. He decided that he must let Doctor handle all. He started to work even in his sick condition. He was not sure how long he might feel sick. He feared that if he waited to get cured then by that time his company might be destroyed beyond damage so he decided that he must interfere in matter. He began to work on his idea of surviving company as best as possible. He wanted his company to be perfect. It was necessary for his life.
Sarika was so confused when he started to talk in this style. She didn't understand what exactly he had in his mind. She still remembered his angry face when he saw those letters in her drawer. She wanted to hide that entire matter from him. But now it had came in light she wanted to discuss all openly. She was having affair since she didn't like to stay caged in this house. Yogesh was interesting man. He showed her many places. He took her to many hotels. He was not so rich. Satish was truly rich man. But Satish never thought that he was rich enough. He wanted to become more rich. He spent his every day in finding way to earn money. He always kept insisting on earning more money which was frustrating. He didn't understand importance of spending time with family. They had two kids. Raju and Rati. But those kids managed to spend more time with Yogesh than Satish. She wanted him to pay attention to his family but he was not ready. Then one day she met her old college friend Yogesh. He was so nice to her. He needed to find some companion. She soon understood that he was never married. He said " I didn't find someone with whom I like to spend my life." She felt that he might be looking at her with hope. She knew that she was not planning to leave Satish. Satish was nice husband. He was too busy. But still she needed him. She needed a husband who took proper care of her kids. She knew that Yogesh kept shifting jobs. According to Yogesh life was adventure. She didn't like his this type of attitude. She wanted mature man as her husband but when Yogesh started to visit her house, she began to like those daily meetings. She started to feel so happy when he suggested that they should go out with kids. He included kids so that invitation seemed okay. She felt that he was not trying to suggest anything wrong. Then slowly when they started to visit different places, people started to consider them husband and wife. It all started just as fun. She didn't sense when she started to cross limits. She began to get carried away. She started to dream her life with Yogesh. She didn't even sense when she began to cheat Satish. Everything seemed okay. She was not keeping any physical relationship. It was just normal chitchat. Everything was for fun. Then one day suddenly Raju came from school with angry look. He asked " Mom why did we go out with Yogesh Uncle instead of Dad? My school friend was asking about it. His parents were talking about you. They said you are disgusting woman who is having affair with another man while innocent husband is working in office." She was so upset. She never thought about it this way. She asked " What is name of your friend?" He told it. She searched for his teacher's number. Then she called his teacher. His teacher took call when she told everything. Teacher sounded confused. Teacher " Do you want me to change sitting place or you want me to change his division? But I feel changing division is too much. He can't run away from facts like that. I might keep that boy away from him..but truthfully everyone is talking you can't hide from all. He need to face it." She was so shocked." I don't understand what my son needed to face?!!" " Crack in your relationship with husband? Everyone know that you are dating different guy so it is clear that your relationship was not going to survive. We all know and sense it. So your son need to accept that too." She screamed on teacher without sensing it. " Who told you this nonsense?!! I am not going to left my husband." That teacher sounded angry after this. She said " If you can like that people will think so. I suggest you should stop going out with that friend." " But this is my personal matter." " Well but then people will comment and your kids will suffer." Then teacher disconnected call. She felt so shocked. She never expected such thing from anyone but now she sensed that people were looking at her in bad light. She immediately called Yogesh and told him that she didn't meet him. Yogesh felt so upset. He didn't suggest that she should leave husband for him etc. He said " It's alright." But after that they started exchanging letters. Then on his birthday she went to meet him alone. She began to sense different feelings about him. She didn't want to cross limits. But she began to feel that she might need to. She was so confused when Satish found those letters. He immediately declared that he would not accept her betrayal and he wanted to get divorce. At beginning she felt sad but then she felt that she needed to face truth. She was involved in Yogesh and she couldn't able to leave him. But she wanted to stay with Satish too. He was so perfect as husband. Then suddenly unexpected Rani entered in room. Rani " I heard all your conversation Mom. I want you to stay with Dad. Yogesh Uncle is not as responsible as Dad. He will never able to look after us in same way." She was so upset and confused. She waited for Satish's response. But his response was shocking. He was acting as if nothing had happened. She didn't understand this. She thought that he might be just pretending. But then she couldn't believe that he was pretending. If he had forgotten entire incidence then it was worst that she thought. She didn't want herself to be blamed for destroying some human being's life. But she was sure that something wrong was happening. She knew that she didn't want to cause any harm to Satish. She was ready on both options. She could stay with him or stay without him. But she didn't want to harm his sanity. But she sensed that it was happening. She was so confused. She didn't want to make him mad. She didn't want to be blamed like that by kids. She looked out of window. She didn't understand why did she went out with Yogesh on first time. It started all this. Now she couldn't just back out. Yogesh was after her. He was calling her again and again. While Satish was pretending as if nothing had happened, Yogesh kept convincing her that she must take bold step of leaving her husband. She was confused. Then she felt one thing that she needed to help Satish. She must tell him all. She must convince him truth of their situation after that she needed to take her decision. She must help him first.
Satish kept thinking about that thing which was making him restless. He was glad when finally time came when he could visit Doctor. He wanted to visit Doctor and confirm what was wrong with his health. He always felt that he was perfectly healthy person. But now his health was getting upset without cause. He started to fall sick. He needed Doctor. He felt so relieved when finally Tina called and told him that Taxi was booked for his Doctor's appointment and it would come in five minutes. He took his briefcase and got ready to leave. He sat inside Taxi. He began to feel relaxed. He knew that Doctor would cure him. He went in clinic. Soon Doctor took him inside. Doctor kept checking him. Soon it became clear to him that Doctor didn't detect anything wrong in him. Doctor " Maybe you are feeling uneasy due to your increased acidity." Satish nodded. Satish " Now a days due to stress of work I keep getting acidity. But I never felt so restless. I just kept feeling something strange as if someone is putting heavy weight on my head." Doctor looked confused. " Your head!! Do you have cold or fever? Sinus might have this effect." "No..no I don't have any sign of cold." Doctor looked more confused. Then Doctor gave him medicine of acidity. But Satish knew that it was not enough. He was feeling so sick. Satish "Doctor I am feeling so strange. I don't believe it is just acidity. I feel it is something serious. I can't remember something. It is so important." Doctor laughed. Doctor " It always happens with me every day. Nothing is shocking about it." Satish didn't like the way Doctor taking it. He was taking it too easily. He didn't feel it was such light issue. Something was wrong with him. He could feel it and wanted to convince someone about it. But he knew that it was impossible to convince this Doctor about it. He just nodded and took medicine. Then he went out. He saw Sarika's call. He didn't want to scare her but he needed to tell her so he took call. Sarika " I wanted to talk with you. Where are you?" Satish " Actually I am not feeling okay so I went to Doctor." She sounded scared now. He felt so happy. She always loved him. " Nothing much. I am feeling little uneasy." "Do you remember what happened in morning?" He felt so confused. He began to think that it was so needful after Doctor joked about it. Now he began to doubt it again. " No..but Doctor said it's okay." She screamed " No..no it is not okay. It was not small incidence. You must remember it." He was so confused. She said " Come home." He agreed. He went back. She was looking so tense. He noticed even kids were sitting nearby. She took deep breath and said " Read this." She had few letters in her hand. He saw them and suddenly he was no longer wanted to stand there. He began to feel so thirsty. " I want some water." He said and ran in kitchen. He began to drink water. He drank four glass of water. He didn't why but his thirst was not reducing. He wanted to keep drinking water. Then suddenly Sarika took hold of his hand. Sarika " What are you trying to do? You kill yourself like this." He laughed. " No one die due to drinking too much water." Raju "But it damage your organ by putting too much pressure, if you drink too much at one time!" Rani " Who told you this nonsense? I told believe it." Sarika " Enough!! I am discussing something serious." Satish was confused now. She once again pushed letters. " Read this!!" He didn't want to. He just began to scream " Take them away." She started to come towards him with those letters. He didn't understand why but he started running away from them. He was crying like small child. They all started to look shocked. Sarika tried to console him. But nothing was helping. He didn't even remember what was in those letters but he kept crying at their sight. Sarika said slowly " I feel you need psychiatrist." He was so shocked. He was perfect. He didn't even seeing some imaginary people. " I am fine." Sarika pushed those letters towards him in ruthless way and said " Then read them." He sensed that love from her eyes was missing. He began to feel strange fear. He began to shiver. He didn't want to appear that way before his kids but he couldn't help. Sarika " I can't tolerate mad husband. I am leaving you. It's up to you if you want to go to psychiatrist or go to hell. Truthfully I don't care. I am taking kids with me." Kids argued. " We want to stay with Dad." " You can't!! Don't you understand. He can't cook or take care of you. You are coming with me." He was so shocked. He did all for his family and now his family was leaving him. He tried to stop them. But nothing worked. She left him. She took away kids too. His every argument seemed useless. He was so upset. He even started to throw things towards her. Sarika began to scream " You are mad man." He sensed that she was right. He stopped throwing things. When they went out, he once again sat alone. He looked around. He felt that life was useless. He didn't move. He sat there for hours. He lost sense of time. Finally he heard knock of door. People were taking his name. He sensed it but he didn't want to move so he didn't. He just shivered. He was so scared. He didn't want to read those letters. Then he saw people broke door. When he saw Sarika was with letters in door, she was screaming " Read them..read them." He began to scream.
Tina was confused when Satish didn't came in office. She began to feel that he must be sick so she called him. He didn't took her calls. She began to get tense. Her husband asked. She told him all. Tina's husband " Why don't you call his wife?" " But what if she took wrong way?" " If we don't have anything wrong in heart why should we care what people feel?!!" " But what if it cause fight between husband and wife." Tina's husband started laughing. " What happened?" " If just by one call from a lady marriage get disturbed then that disturbance is not due to that phone call. Spouse need psychiatrist." Tina nodded. But she was still scared. Then her husband took her mobile. " I got better idea. I will call her and tell her I am Satish's friend." She nodded with smile. Tina's husband called Sarika. Sarika " I left Satish. He is mad man. He was getting violent without cause. He threw things at us. We are in process of divorce so don't call me again." Tina's husband was shocked. He told all to Tina. Tina " She is lying. Everything was fine just few days ago. That day Boss just complaint about forgetting something. What did he forget?" Tina shivered with fear. She understood all. Tina " Maybe wife's cheating?!!" Tina's husband " We must visit your Boss. He need help of friend." They both went there. When he didn't open door, Tina felt confused. Tina " We are relatives. We can't just force door." Her husband " But we know he is not fine. We are friends so we can't let him die, can we?" Tina felt so scared by this thought. Then they called watchman. Finally they forced door. When they opened it, Satish was in worst condition. He was throwing things and screamed. They needed to run after him. Doctor was called and he was taken to hospital. Tina was so shocked. Tina knew that she was not relative but she wanted to help Satish. She was so happy when her husband paid for Satish's medical bills. He presented himself as family friend. He discussed with Doctor. Doctor told him that Satish was suffering mental problem due to trouble in marriage. Psychiatrist explained all. Finally he said "Don't worry he will be fine soon." Tina nodded and went away. Tina turned to her husband and said " Never cheat me!!" He started laughing. Tina sensed for first time how could mind react to it. She felt so scared. Person who was perfect on one day turned totally mad on next day. Mind was mystery to her now.
The End
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