Life becomes dream
Sunit started laughing from heart when he began to watch that movie. He was feeling so happy and enchanted during movie. He began to feel as if he was living in totally different world. He was so upset about everything. He didn't understand what was reality. He felt so happy. Suddenly he began to feel as if he was inside that movie. He didn't understand when he began to imagine that he was a character from movie. He began to feel so happy about entire plot. He was so involved. He started to run with character from movie. He began to become part of movie. He slowly began to sense different thought from mind. He began to start to become path of concept in life. He began to sense that he was part of it. Soon he started to feel world was just inside that screen. It was strange. It was totally wonderful. He was sitting with his friend and suddenly entire theater vanished. He just became character of movie. He started running around with those people. He started doing those stunts. He was so involved in every step. That he just lost sense on surrounding. He felt as if entire theater was one big movie. He was watching every thing. Meena was sitting with him. She had came with intention to enjoy company of Sunit. Sunit normally didn't have time for her due to his work. He kept going out even for business trips so life was not pleasant for her. She never managed to get company of her boyfriend. She hated every time when she thought about it. She never understood why did she taking so much risk. Her friends kept telling her that she must demand some commitment from him. But she didn't want to lose him so she kept quiet but it was getting worst for her now. Since she couldn't hide it from her parents every time. She looked around. She felt so scared that one day someone might caught her. She looked around. She could see no one was sitting there who might recognize her. She smiled when she sensed that no one was there. She was so happy. She sat on her chair. She was expecting that Sunit would hold her hand. But he didn't do any thing . He was so involved in that movie. It seemed as if remaining world was not existed for him. But it was too much for her. She was not sitting in that theater with him just to watch that stupid movie. She was not interested in it. She wanted him to show little attachment towards her. But he was so busy in that movie. She was so upset. Today she got dressed in best way. She watched herself in mirror again and again countless times. She was looking truly beautiful. She just didn't understand why he like her. It was so wrong. She was not that bad but for him. She was just nothing. She kept trying hard every day but she never saw smile in his eyes as it once used to be. She was feeling so frustrated. She was so confused. She decided that she had waited for long time. She decided that on that moment she had to make some move. She started to hold his hand. But he was still not interested in her. He was so busy in movie. She sensed something was not right about it. He didn't seem to sense that she sitting beside him. She was so hurt. He was trying to ignore her. She decided that she might just call him. She started taking his name but he didn't seem to listen it. She sensed that he was just too busy in watching that movie. It was not strange. She kept convincing herself that he was just too involved in that movie. She kept telling herself to relax. Then she tried to concentrate on movie. But she kept looking at Sunit. She kept feeling that something was totally wrong with him. It was so frustrating. She knew that Sunit was all right but still she kept feeling doubts in her mind. She kept looking towards him. Finally movie stopped and interval started. She was so glad. She turned towards Sunit. She touched his hand. He was still watching movie. There was such strange look in his eyes. He seemed like locked to that screen. She kept touching him. He didn't response. She felt so scared then finally he smiled. She screamed on him while giving playful slap on his hand "Are you trying to give heart attack to me? I felt something happened to you." He smiled and took hold of her hand like he used to before. " Actually something strange happen to me. I feel as if my soul went out in that movie." She started laughing. Then they went to counter to buy snacks so that whole day was perfect for them. She felt that she managed to get Sunit back. She decided that it was time to put forward her question. " So when are you going to take me to your parents?" " My parents?" She was so angry. She suddenly sensed that he didn't have any plan to marry her. " So you are not planning to marry me?" He looked confused now. He didn't understand anything for moment. Meena was so shocked. She sensed that he might be totally forgotten about marriage. She started shivering. "Meena, Are you planning to marry me?" " Yes of course. I was just sick today." Now Meena started to feel concerned. She began to feel so happiness regarding his agreement in their marriage. She knew that she must not think that way when he was sick but then she wanted to get married. She convinced herself that he would get well soon. Meena " I think we need to watch movie. It will relax you." He nodded and smiled. He was feeling okay now. They bought few things to eat and went ahead with movie. This time he didn't felt strange during movie. It was normal. He tried to hold Meena's hand who was happy. He even promised her that he would talk to his parents soon. He knew that he had to do it. He felt confident about himself. After all he had job now. He was earning properly too so he could marry by his choice. He decide in his heart that he would do it on that day.
When Sunit returned home, he was so happy. But then he heard frustrating voice of his Mom and his peace just vanished. He sensed that something was wrong again. He just didn't want to get tense now. He entered in house. He saw his brother was sitting on table. In that small house he just hated to see crowd. His brother had separate house but still he kept coming here. Sometimes Sunit felt that his brother's marriage was not much successful. He kept giving excuses. At beginning he used to tell he was coming to take care of their Mom and Dad. But Sunit knew very well that his parents never needed any help. In fact he needed help to keep control of his mind before them. They both kept their opinion and none of them was ready to move behind. Their fights were always worst but his elder brother Satish never mind them. In fact many times he saw him enjoying them. He used to laugh a lot in childhood when their parents used to fight. For Sunit it was so stressful. He always hated when they started to fight. He wanted them to divide work but they never listened. He felt so frustrated with their this attitude. They just kept arguing. He knew that they were arguing today too. He just wanted to return to that theater. He wanted to become once again that happy man. But then he remembered that he had to talk about Meena too. He had avoided it for long time. He sensed that he was doing injustice towards Meena. He came and gave smile. Then suddenly his Mom came towards him. Mom started pushing picture of one girl before him. He was not happy about it. He knew what she would suggest next. But he didn't argue. He just let her continued. Mom " This is perfect girl for you. Did you saw her earnings? She would help you to buy new house. In this world income of one person is not enough. In my time I managed but it was so hard." His Dad " You managed?!! Or I needed to earn more to fulfill your every wish. You never earned a rupee." " What about that money which took from my Dad from time to time? You keep demanding even when he was not that much willing." "Really? I was demanding. You are talking as if I have harassed your parents for dowry. It was happening since you have your never stopping demands. You want Air conditioner and you want big flat screen TV.." " Ohh really but every one had it." " Still if we can't afford it then you could have kept quiet about it." " So since I keep irritating you, you decided to demand it from my Dad." " Stop lying. I never demanded it from him. I told him to tell you to keep. Since they knew their daughter couldn't able to stop demanding they gifted it to us. Any way I needed that Air conditioner. Every one in this house knew that I hardly use it." " Ohh really. Who used to demand to start Air conditioner immediately after entering in house!" " If we have Air conditioner I will use it. I don't want it but when it came in house. I started to use it." Dad was so upset now. He started to remembering those things which was not for him. It was hard task since he mostly used everything inside that house. His Dad was fond of luxuries just like his Mom. It was frustrating for him when he had to live without them. As per Sunti's logic his Mom and Dad both were equally greedy so they kept demanding things from his grandparents from both sides. He knew now his Dad was going to count things which his Mom got from her Mother-in-law. He had enough of this nonsense so he screamed " Enough. I want to tell you I like one girl and I am going to marry her." His parents looked shocked. But Satish started smiling. Satish " Can't you guess that much Mom and Dad? Now a days we hardly see him in house on Saturday and Sunday." Dad " What did it show? You are happily married still always here on every weekends." Satish began to sense that things were turning against him so he decided to keep quiet. Sunit was so frustrated. He sensed that his parents were moving away from his subject. They were once again busy in discussing Satish's married life which was not normal. Since he was staying with his parents on every weekend while his wife and kids were in his house. Satish " I stay with my family every day so I come on weekend to meet you." Mom " Really? But we never asked you to do so?" Satish was so angry. Satish " Fine. You don't ask but I come. Now I need to do some work. I am going in bedroom." Every one knew that it was Satish's way to avoid answer since he did not have any answer. Sunit was glad that finally he went out. Now Sunit had to make everything clear to his parents. Sunit " Mom and Dad listen to me. I am in love with Meena. I was going out with her for long time. Now I want to marry her." His Mom was not much interested in arguing now. She nodded. Mom " Fine. You can do as you wish." Then his Mom started to talking with his Dad again. He was expecting some discussion about Meena but one thing was clear that they were no longer interested in his wife. He wanted them to discuss it but they were just interested in arguing with each other. He went inside bedroom. Satish was sitting there and he was fully interested in his life. When he entered, Satish immediately started asking question. Sunit was not interested in answering him. He told him basic things and just vanished. But he could sensed that Satish was interested in meeting Meena. He hated it when Satish started to show interest in his girl. He felt so insecure. He always felt that Satish was better than him. He was so tense. He decided to go out. Then Meena's call came. He immediately ran out of room. He told her that he talked with his parents. She sounded very happy on phone. He just hoped from his heart that she would be happy same way even after marrying him. He felt peaceful since finally entire issue was over and he was happy about it. But soon he started to sense tension about getting married. He knew that he had to handle everything between his parents and Meena's family. Now it was not just Meena. It was going to issue between two families. He began to feel more upset. He decided that he might eat alone in kitchen on that day. He just forced food under his throat and immediately went to sleep. He avoided to chatting every one. He decided that it would be best way to avoid tension. He was so happy when he started to feel sleepy immediately. He peacefully went to sleep.
Next morning Sunit was totally fresh. He started to get ready. He was feeling so confident. Then he received call from Meena. She was so happy. It turned out that her some relative knew his parents. They told good things about his family. Her parents were happy about this proposal. He was happy too. He went to his Mom and told this to her. Suddenly it started to make sense to all. He was so pleasant when his Mom started talking positively about his marriage. It was wonderful start for him. He was so happy but on some point he was still tense too. They decided they would arrange meeting with Meena's parents after two days. He was so happy. Meena was chatting with him again and again. She was so happy regarding marriage. She was planning every thing for marriage. She was planning every thing without thinking about money. She began to plan every thing in perfect way. But she was not considering budget. He was feeling so tense about it. He was feeling so upset that his mother might object these things. He didn't want to destroy her fun so he just kept agreeing. Then finally that day came when they were going to visit them. Every thing was just fine. He was so confident. He knew that he would look his best and impress Meena's parents. He went in his room and got ready. He was watching himself in mirror when he suddenly sensed that something was wrong. He was watching himself. But he was not inside himself. He wanted to laugh on this thought but his lips were not moving. It was not in control. He was not smiling. He wanted to smile and joke about his attitude but he couldn't. He just started brushing hairs. He knew his hair were perfect. He needed to stop brushing. But he began to feel that he was out of picture in some unknown world where he was not truly part of picture. He was just watching it from far away point. He was no longer part of life. He was watching every move and activity. He started to sense that his hair were moving in wrong way. He was so tense. He wanted to become part of it. Then he saw Satish was coming inside. He could see him but he couldn't sense him. He was so frustrated. He wanted to feel part of his body. But he was far away from it. He was so anxious. But he felt lucky when he sensed that he was once again in his control. But Satish managed to tap him many times before that control. Satish " What happened? Why you were standing before mirror like statue?" He was so confused. He didn't know it's answer by himself. He just smiled and said " let's go." Satish nodded. Then they went out. He acted in perfect way. He felt so perfect. Then after some time all told Meena to go out with Sunit. Sunit gave smile but he decided that he must not hide what happened to him from Meena. He felt that it might be some sickness. But when he saw her face, he felt so confused and hurt. It was not right. She was so happy. He didn't want to destroy her happiness. He kept chatting about other things. He was nervous. But he pretended that he was happy from soul He showed off as if he was most happy man in world. It was not easy but he pretended. In his heart he decided to do medical check up on next day. He had to confirm that he was not sick. He had to sense that he was fine and healthy. But if he was sick, he was feeling more sorry for Meena than himself. It was so strange. He couldn't control his body. He started thinking about sickness. He thought long list of them. In few he might become bedridden for entire life too. He was so scared and shivering with fear. Meena sensed once again that something was wrong with him. Now he was going to marry her. She was confused by his attitude. She decided that she had to ask him frankly. Meena " What happened? I hope you are happy about marrying her. " "Yes..yes I am happy about it. I never have any objection in marrying you." " So what's problem? Did your parents have any problem?" " No..no at beginning Mom was upset but then it turned out that she knew your parents so they are happy about it." " Then what is problem?" He decided that he must told her all. They were getting marry he could not hide anything from her. He smiled and said slowly " Actually it is about my health problem?" " Health problem?" Meena was shocked. She never thought it could be health problem. She checked him for temperature. He was fine on at least that front. " I don't have fever. It is strange thing that is happening to me. It might be more risky than fever." "What is happening to you?" " Well my hand is no longer in my control. " " What? I don't understand? Are you telling me that you can't control your hand any more? But you were holding it properly before few moments?" " I know but it happens always suddenly when I expect it least." Meena was so shocked. Meena wanted to marry him but if he was having some serious trouble then she had to think twice about it. Since in this marriage he was only bread earner if he couldn't able to earn this would be just burden on him. She loved him and he didn't want to become burden on him. Meena " If you are seriously sick then we might postpone this marriage." He looked upset. He began to sense betrayal in her voice. Meena " Don't look that way. I am not denying marriage with you. I just suggested that you should take treatment and then we will get married. I will not going to marry some one else so no need to feel so upset. " He started to laugh on his childish jealousy. She joined him too. After all they couldn't change their future but they decided that they could enjoy at least their today. They were so happy together. Suddenly Sunit started to feel hopeful about entire issue. He was so happy. Meena decided in her heart that she would tell her parents everything when they reached home. This way they would not hurry up their marriage. She wanted to be happily married woman. She had lots of patience if it was needed for it. She convinced herself that she had waited for such long time so she could easily wait for more time. They both went back and joined others who didn't know they might have to face sorrows too. Their sole concern on that moment was just fixing marriage. But they had to face lot more troubles before it.
Meena was concern now. She knew that she had promised Sunit their marriage. But she was not sure that her parents would think same way when they knew about Sunit's sickness. She was sure that they would pressure her to marry some one else. She didn't want that to happen. She wanted to marry Sunit. She went out. She smiled and said to parents " Mom I was thinking. We might wait for few days before getting married." Her parents clearly started to look tense. Her Mom " What happened? I hope you are not changing your plans regarding your marriage since we will not permit it. I want to you to get married to that boy as soon as possible. After all you were wandering around the city with him." " Mom I was not wandering around city. I just went on few movies and ate few dinners." Mom asked her angrily " What else do you feel you need to bring bad reputation for you? " Dad " Now don't act like some stubborn girl. We have fixed your marriage with boy of your choice so marry with him and it will be over." Meena was so upset now. Her parents were just interested in finishing whole matter. She suddenly found a brilliant idea in her mind. Meena " And where did we stay? Are you going to lend us our flat?" Now this managed to confuse her parents. They didn't want to spare their investment on her. It was their security of old age. They couldn't give it to her. They needed it. They looked confused. Mom " You truly need it? Then we can give it." Dad nodded too. Meena " No need of sacrifice. We need to just wait with patience. Sunit told me. He will get flat in six months. We need to wait just for six months." Dad " Six months?!! This is long time." Mom " No one can get flat so quickly. But we need to do engagement at least." Meena was confused now. Meena decided that she could get engaged. Meena nodded. Then her parents decided to plan their engagement. Meena called Sunit and tell him her entire arrangement. Sunit agreed. Then he called Doctor. He took his appointment. He was so tense. He kept moving his hands. They were moving in perfect way. It was so strange. He didn't understand when it would start to happen. He couldn't move on some point. But sometimes he was perfect. He was so tense. He knew that it was happening with him again and again. He was not so nervous at beginning. He thought that it was some strange experience. He began to feel so happy from his soul. It was something so different like some paranormal experience. But then he slowly started to sense logical explanation it would be sickness. He began to study many books of diseases. He began to study them. He didn't want to just go to Doctor without guess. But step by step he began to sense there were many diseases which would look perfect for his sickness. He started to counting days of his life. He knew that he was going out with Meena which was wrong in his this condition but still he wanted to enjoy his life. He wanted to spend some time with his love. But sometimes he began to feel his love was selfish. He had to give freedom to Meena for her life. He began to feel that he was acting selfish by engaging to her. He needed to give her chance to enjoy her life. He knew what he supposed to do. He called on land line. Her Mom took his call. She was talking with him very sweetly. She was expecting him to become her son-in-law. He knew that it was artificial respect. She wanted him to get married with her daughter at any cost. He decided that he must tell truth. He sensed that this pleasant feeling was just artificial one. He knew that they would vanish when he would tell them truth. But he knew that it was important to all. He told every thing in just one breathe to Meena's Mom. Her Mom sounded angry " If you were sick why did you keep going out with Meena?" " I don't sense it on that time. Mommy." " Don't call me Mommy. I am not going to let my daughter marry you. I want you to stay away from her." " Sure. I can understand. Give my best wishes to Meena." " Sure her future will be best without you. You were just burden on our family. You were most poor son-in-law of our entire family." Sunit felt so hurt. He decided that he didn't want to hear more so he just disconnected call. He came out of room. He thought that he could tell his parents easily. But he started crying. His Dad and Mom was shocked. He was so glad that Satish was not there on that moment. Mom " What happened?" He sat down. Then he suddenly began to sense it again. He was no longer in his body. His Mom was touching him but he couldn't feel it. He felt as if his soul was standing out of his body. He was so upset. He could see his parents were crying. They were getting nervous. His Dad started to call Doctor. His Mom even slapped him to bring his senses back. But nothing was working. He was still out of his body which was worst news for him. But he was feeling nothing. His whole life suddenly became dream for him. He felt it was some performance which was happening before him. He didn't sense any pain out of it. He was just that way for some time. But when Doctor came to check, he was fine again. He began to feel every pain in his body. He was so confused. He told everything to Doctor. Doctor looked tense. He started to check his blood pressure. It was little high but not too much. Doctor started to give list of tests. Sunit just slept on bed. He sensed that he was sick so he had to make himself ready for sitting in hospital. His Mom looked at him with tense emotion but he returned it with smile. Sunit " I take few days off from office. After test we can move ahead. I will be fine. Mom. We must keep hope high on each point." His Mom nodded. Sunit closed his eyes and tried his best to reduce his fear.
After that Sunit started checking every thing. His physical fitness was confirmed. He was so confused. He was still facing physical trouble. He couldn't take bigger leave from office so he started to going in office. But he was so tense. Many times he just sat there without moving. Every thing began to become dream. It was worst when it happened in office. Finally one day Boss asked him. Boss " What is wrong with you? Why you keep sitting like that on some point? Don't you want to work here?" " No..no sir. I want to work.." He started typing as fast as possible. He began to work with more speed. Boss was looking so angry. He screamed loudly on him " I see it many times you just keep sitting while other person keep screaming. What is going on? Just tell me." Sunit was trying hard to control himself. He didn't want to cry before all staff of office. He just kept looking at other wall. But it didn't help him much. Slowly tears started to fall on his cheeks he couldn't control it at all. It was frustrating. He began to feel so upset. But Boss didn't sense it. Boss kept screaming on him until finally one of his colleagues interfered. " Sir he is sick." Boss " Sick? What happened to him? Why don't he take leave then?" " He is doing some tests so he is coming during that time and.." " I don't want a sick person in my office. Just get out." Sunit was so upset. He was sad as well as angry. He started to gather his stuff. He took every thing as fast as he could and just dash out of that door without any second thought. He didn't stop until he didn't reach on road. Then he sensed how lost his life was. He lost his love first. Since he knew that Meena was going to marry some one else soon. Now he had lost his job. Every thing was happening due to that strange sickness. Only if he didn't have those fits, it was getting worst day by day. He decided that instead of going back home. He should go to Doctor. He waited outside with patience until Doctor didn't call him. Finally receptionist told him " Doctor can see you now?" He just nodded and went inside. He was so depressed now that he just didn't understand how to tell Doctor his troubles. Slowly he told him all. Doctor " Can I suggest you something?" " Yes Doctor. I am totally desperate and open to all your suggestions." Doctor " Go to psychiatrist." Sunit was not open to this suggestion. Sunit " I am not mad and I am not doing this for attention." " Psychology is not that simple. Listen to me go to psychiatrist or you need to suffer more." He nodded. He took card. He once again took appointment. He sat outside. Now sitting outside Doctor's room become job to him. Then he sensed that he just lost his job so now this might become his only job. He started laughing by himself. But then soon he controlled himself. But he managed to create fear in other patients. He tried to convince all. " I am fine." But no one was ready to believe him. They managed to create quick appointment for him. When he went inside, he began to convince Psychiatrist that he was not mad. But when Psychiatrist started smiling, he sensed his mistake. Sunit smiled and said " I am mad." Psychiatrist " Not mad. You just have little mental disorder and tell me about it." He began to tell all to Psychiatrist. Psychiatrist kept nodding. "So can you identify this sickness?" " Yes I am." Sunit was shocked by psychiatrist's confidence. He never thought that he was having mental problem. " Can you tell me cause of it?" " Well your problem is depersonalization disorder. In this patient began to think that he was no longer inside his body. In case of cause we can't just point out one. I can see many causes of stress in your life. But we all have stress in life so what is use of blaming it. I just feel we need to find way to handle it." " But I don't understand why it is happening? I lost every hope of my life just due to this sickness and you are telling me that we must not search for cause. It was so frustrating. I need to find at least reason behind it. How can you cure it without understanding reason. I can't believe you can find way to cure me." He was screaming loudly. He was getting frustrated and angry. He didn't even sense when he started to scream so loudly that his voice started to go out. Suddenly Nurse opened small crack of door. " Every thing is alright." Sunit felt so ashamed. He started to apologizing Psychiatrist. Psychiatrist smiled " Just relax. This is happened due to stress." " Can you help me?" " Yes I can if you cooperate and keep faith on me." He nodded. Psychiatrist " Okay let me explain all to you." After that he started listening to Psychiatrist. When he went home, he was ready to start his fight with his trouble again. He was so confident. But when he saw his parents, he started to feel tense again. Then he reminded himself of those words which psychiatrist told him. He went inside. He told everything to his parents. They started creating issue but he just went inside room. He sat on internet and began searching for new job. He knew that he had to search for job. Then he received a call. It was from Meena. Meena " I want to meet you. I don't want to marry any one else." He started laughing. She was so confused. " Actually I lost my job today. I have learn my problem is mental." Meena didn't speak for some time. Then she talked " I want to talk with your Psychiatrist and I will wait for you until you don't get new decent job. I have waited for so long few months will not harm." " It might turn in years." Meena " Don't you understand my problem if I try to replace you I might not able to adjust with that new man for entire life so what is adjustment of few years." " Sorry. You are welcome back in my life but this route is not going to be pleasant." " But I am tough one. You know me." He laughed. Finally he got at least one good new. Meena " So we will get engaged and our marriage will wait." " Sure. I need you." Meena laughed. She felt so glad to hear this. First time he expressed his feeling. He sensed that Psychiatrist managed to help him little bit. He began to see ray of hope. He went out and told his parents that he was getting engaged. He didn't pay any attention to their objection. He went back to search for new job. He decided that he would start his life once again with Meena. This time he would make every thing right. He would not lose his second chance.
The End
Sunit started laughing from heart when he began to watch that movie. He was feeling so happy and enchanted during movie. He began to feel as if he was living in totally different world. He was so upset about everything. He didn't understand what was reality. He felt so happy. Suddenly he began to feel as if he was inside that movie. He didn't understand when he began to imagine that he was a character from movie. He began to feel so happy about entire plot. He was so involved. He started to run with character from movie. He began to become part of movie. He slowly began to sense different thought from mind. He began to start to become path of concept in life. He began to sense that he was part of it. Soon he started to feel world was just inside that screen. It was strange. It was totally wonderful. He was sitting with his friend and suddenly entire theater vanished. He just became character of movie. He started running around with those people. He started doing those stunts. He was so involved in every step. That he just lost sense on surrounding. He felt as if entire theater was one big movie. He was watching every thing. Meena was sitting with him. She had came with intention to enjoy company of Sunit. Sunit normally didn't have time for her due to his work. He kept going out even for business trips so life was not pleasant for her. She never managed to get company of her boyfriend. She hated every time when she thought about it. She never understood why did she taking so much risk. Her friends kept telling her that she must demand some commitment from him. But she didn't want to lose him so she kept quiet but it was getting worst for her now. Since she couldn't hide it from her parents every time. She looked around. She felt so scared that one day someone might caught her. She looked around. She could see no one was sitting there who might recognize her. She smiled when she sensed that no one was there. She was so happy. She sat on her chair. She was expecting that Sunit would hold her hand. But he didn't do any thing . He was so involved in that movie. It seemed as if remaining world was not existed for him. But it was too much for her. She was not sitting in that theater with him just to watch that stupid movie. She was not interested in it. She wanted him to show little attachment towards her. But he was so busy in that movie. She was so upset. Today she got dressed in best way. She watched herself in mirror again and again countless times. She was looking truly beautiful. She just didn't understand why he like her. It was so wrong. She was not that bad but for him. She was just nothing. She kept trying hard every day but she never saw smile in his eyes as it once used to be. She was feeling so frustrated. She was so confused. She decided that she had waited for long time. She decided that on that moment she had to make some move. She started to hold his hand. But he was still not interested in her. He was so busy in movie. She sensed something was not right about it. He didn't seem to sense that she sitting beside him. She was so hurt. He was trying to ignore her. She decided that she might just call him. She started taking his name but he didn't seem to listen it. She sensed that he was just too busy in watching that movie. It was not strange. She kept convincing herself that he was just too involved in that movie. She kept telling herself to relax. Then she tried to concentrate on movie. But she kept looking at Sunit. She kept feeling that something was totally wrong with him. It was so frustrating. She knew that Sunit was all right but still she kept feeling doubts in her mind. She kept looking towards him. Finally movie stopped and interval started. She was so glad. She turned towards Sunit. She touched his hand. He was still watching movie. There was such strange look in his eyes. He seemed like locked to that screen. She kept touching him. He didn't response. She felt so scared then finally he smiled. She screamed on him while giving playful slap on his hand "Are you trying to give heart attack to me? I felt something happened to you." He smiled and took hold of her hand like he used to before. " Actually something strange happen to me. I feel as if my soul went out in that movie." She started laughing. Then they went to counter to buy snacks so that whole day was perfect for them. She felt that she managed to get Sunit back. She decided that it was time to put forward her question. " So when are you going to take me to your parents?" " My parents?" She was so angry. She suddenly sensed that he didn't have any plan to marry her. " So you are not planning to marry me?" He looked confused now. He didn't understand anything for moment. Meena was so shocked. She sensed that he might be totally forgotten about marriage. She started shivering. "Meena, Are you planning to marry me?" " Yes of course. I was just sick today." Now Meena started to feel concerned. She began to feel so happiness regarding his agreement in their marriage. She knew that she must not think that way when he was sick but then she wanted to get married. She convinced herself that he would get well soon. Meena " I think we need to watch movie. It will relax you." He nodded and smiled. He was feeling okay now. They bought few things to eat and went ahead with movie. This time he didn't felt strange during movie. It was normal. He tried to hold Meena's hand who was happy. He even promised her that he would talk to his parents soon. He knew that he had to do it. He felt confident about himself. After all he had job now. He was earning properly too so he could marry by his choice. He decide in his heart that he would do it on that day.
When Sunit returned home, he was so happy. But then he heard frustrating voice of his Mom and his peace just vanished. He sensed that something was wrong again. He just didn't want to get tense now. He entered in house. He saw his brother was sitting on table. In that small house he just hated to see crowd. His brother had separate house but still he kept coming here. Sometimes Sunit felt that his brother's marriage was not much successful. He kept giving excuses. At beginning he used to tell he was coming to take care of their Mom and Dad. But Sunit knew very well that his parents never needed any help. In fact he needed help to keep control of his mind before them. They both kept their opinion and none of them was ready to move behind. Their fights were always worst but his elder brother Satish never mind them. In fact many times he saw him enjoying them. He used to laugh a lot in childhood when their parents used to fight. For Sunit it was so stressful. He always hated when they started to fight. He wanted them to divide work but they never listened. He felt so frustrated with their this attitude. They just kept arguing. He knew that they were arguing today too. He just wanted to return to that theater. He wanted to become once again that happy man. But then he remembered that he had to talk about Meena too. He had avoided it for long time. He sensed that he was doing injustice towards Meena. He came and gave smile. Then suddenly his Mom came towards him. Mom started pushing picture of one girl before him. He was not happy about it. He knew what she would suggest next. But he didn't argue. He just let her continued. Mom " This is perfect girl for you. Did you saw her earnings? She would help you to buy new house. In this world income of one person is not enough. In my time I managed but it was so hard." His Dad " You managed?!! Or I needed to earn more to fulfill your every wish. You never earned a rupee." " What about that money which took from my Dad from time to time? You keep demanding even when he was not that much willing." "Really? I was demanding. You are talking as if I have harassed your parents for dowry. It was happening since you have your never stopping demands. You want Air conditioner and you want big flat screen TV.." " Ohh really but every one had it." " Still if we can't afford it then you could have kept quiet about it." " So since I keep irritating you, you decided to demand it from my Dad." " Stop lying. I never demanded it from him. I told him to tell you to keep. Since they knew their daughter couldn't able to stop demanding they gifted it to us. Any way I needed that Air conditioner. Every one in this house knew that I hardly use it." " Ohh really. Who used to demand to start Air conditioner immediately after entering in house!" " If we have Air conditioner I will use it. I don't want it but when it came in house. I started to use it." Dad was so upset now. He started to remembering those things which was not for him. It was hard task since he mostly used everything inside that house. His Dad was fond of luxuries just like his Mom. It was frustrating for him when he had to live without them. As per Sunti's logic his Mom and Dad both were equally greedy so they kept demanding things from his grandparents from both sides. He knew now his Dad was going to count things which his Mom got from her Mother-in-law. He had enough of this nonsense so he screamed " Enough. I want to tell you I like one girl and I am going to marry her." His parents looked shocked. But Satish started smiling. Satish " Can't you guess that much Mom and Dad? Now a days we hardly see him in house on Saturday and Sunday." Dad " What did it show? You are happily married still always here on every weekends." Satish began to sense that things were turning against him so he decided to keep quiet. Sunit was so frustrated. He sensed that his parents were moving away from his subject. They were once again busy in discussing Satish's married life which was not normal. Since he was staying with his parents on every weekend while his wife and kids were in his house. Satish " I stay with my family every day so I come on weekend to meet you." Mom " Really? But we never asked you to do so?" Satish was so angry. Satish " Fine. You don't ask but I come. Now I need to do some work. I am going in bedroom." Every one knew that it was Satish's way to avoid answer since he did not have any answer. Sunit was glad that finally he went out. Now Sunit had to make everything clear to his parents. Sunit " Mom and Dad listen to me. I am in love with Meena. I was going out with her for long time. Now I want to marry her." His Mom was not much interested in arguing now. She nodded. Mom " Fine. You can do as you wish." Then his Mom started to talking with his Dad again. He was expecting some discussion about Meena but one thing was clear that they were no longer interested in his wife. He wanted them to discuss it but they were just interested in arguing with each other. He went inside bedroom. Satish was sitting there and he was fully interested in his life. When he entered, Satish immediately started asking question. Sunit was not interested in answering him. He told him basic things and just vanished. But he could sensed that Satish was interested in meeting Meena. He hated it when Satish started to show interest in his girl. He felt so insecure. He always felt that Satish was better than him. He was so tense. He decided to go out. Then Meena's call came. He immediately ran out of room. He told her that he talked with his parents. She sounded very happy on phone. He just hoped from his heart that she would be happy same way even after marrying him. He felt peaceful since finally entire issue was over and he was happy about it. But soon he started to sense tension about getting married. He knew that he had to handle everything between his parents and Meena's family. Now it was not just Meena. It was going to issue between two families. He began to feel more upset. He decided that he might eat alone in kitchen on that day. He just forced food under his throat and immediately went to sleep. He avoided to chatting every one. He decided that it would be best way to avoid tension. He was so happy when he started to feel sleepy immediately. He peacefully went to sleep.
Next morning Sunit was totally fresh. He started to get ready. He was feeling so confident. Then he received call from Meena. She was so happy. It turned out that her some relative knew his parents. They told good things about his family. Her parents were happy about this proposal. He was happy too. He went to his Mom and told this to her. Suddenly it started to make sense to all. He was so pleasant when his Mom started talking positively about his marriage. It was wonderful start for him. He was so happy but on some point he was still tense too. They decided they would arrange meeting with Meena's parents after two days. He was so happy. Meena was chatting with him again and again. She was so happy regarding marriage. She was planning every thing for marriage. She was planning every thing without thinking about money. She began to plan every thing in perfect way. But she was not considering budget. He was feeling so tense about it. He was feeling so upset that his mother might object these things. He didn't want to destroy her fun so he just kept agreeing. Then finally that day came when they were going to visit them. Every thing was just fine. He was so confident. He knew that he would look his best and impress Meena's parents. He went in his room and got ready. He was watching himself in mirror when he suddenly sensed that something was wrong. He was watching himself. But he was not inside himself. He wanted to laugh on this thought but his lips were not moving. It was not in control. He was not smiling. He wanted to smile and joke about his attitude but he couldn't. He just started brushing hairs. He knew his hair were perfect. He needed to stop brushing. But he began to feel that he was out of picture in some unknown world where he was not truly part of picture. He was just watching it from far away point. He was no longer part of life. He was watching every move and activity. He started to sense that his hair were moving in wrong way. He was so tense. He wanted to become part of it. Then he saw Satish was coming inside. He could see him but he couldn't sense him. He was so frustrated. He wanted to feel part of his body. But he was far away from it. He was so anxious. But he felt lucky when he sensed that he was once again in his control. But Satish managed to tap him many times before that control. Satish " What happened? Why you were standing before mirror like statue?" He was so confused. He didn't know it's answer by himself. He just smiled and said " let's go." Satish nodded. Then they went out. He acted in perfect way. He felt so perfect. Then after some time all told Meena to go out with Sunit. Sunit gave smile but he decided that he must not hide what happened to him from Meena. He felt that it might be some sickness. But when he saw her face, he felt so confused and hurt. It was not right. She was so happy. He didn't want to destroy her happiness. He kept chatting about other things. He was nervous. But he pretended that he was happy from soul He showed off as if he was most happy man in world. It was not easy but he pretended. In his heart he decided to do medical check up on next day. He had to confirm that he was not sick. He had to sense that he was fine and healthy. But if he was sick, he was feeling more sorry for Meena than himself. It was so strange. He couldn't control his body. He started thinking about sickness. He thought long list of them. In few he might become bedridden for entire life too. He was so scared and shivering with fear. Meena sensed once again that something was wrong with him. Now he was going to marry her. She was confused by his attitude. She decided that she had to ask him frankly. Meena " What happened? I hope you are happy about marrying her. " "Yes..yes I am happy about it. I never have any objection in marrying you." " So what's problem? Did your parents have any problem?" " No..no at beginning Mom was upset but then it turned out that she knew your parents so they are happy about it." " Then what is problem?" He decided that he must told her all. They were getting marry he could not hide anything from her. He smiled and said slowly " Actually it is about my health problem?" " Health problem?" Meena was shocked. She never thought it could be health problem. She checked him for temperature. He was fine on at least that front. " I don't have fever. It is strange thing that is happening to me. It might be more risky than fever." "What is happening to you?" " Well my hand is no longer in my control. " " What? I don't understand? Are you telling me that you can't control your hand any more? But you were holding it properly before few moments?" " I know but it happens always suddenly when I expect it least." Meena was so shocked. Meena wanted to marry him but if he was having some serious trouble then she had to think twice about it. Since in this marriage he was only bread earner if he couldn't able to earn this would be just burden on him. She loved him and he didn't want to become burden on him. Meena " If you are seriously sick then we might postpone this marriage." He looked upset. He began to sense betrayal in her voice. Meena " Don't look that way. I am not denying marriage with you. I just suggested that you should take treatment and then we will get married. I will not going to marry some one else so no need to feel so upset. " He started to laugh on his childish jealousy. She joined him too. After all they couldn't change their future but they decided that they could enjoy at least their today. They were so happy together. Suddenly Sunit started to feel hopeful about entire issue. He was so happy. Meena decided in her heart that she would tell her parents everything when they reached home. This way they would not hurry up their marriage. She wanted to be happily married woman. She had lots of patience if it was needed for it. She convinced herself that she had waited for such long time so she could easily wait for more time. They both went back and joined others who didn't know they might have to face sorrows too. Their sole concern on that moment was just fixing marriage. But they had to face lot more troubles before it.
Meena was concern now. She knew that she had promised Sunit their marriage. But she was not sure that her parents would think same way when they knew about Sunit's sickness. She was sure that they would pressure her to marry some one else. She didn't want that to happen. She wanted to marry Sunit. She went out. She smiled and said to parents " Mom I was thinking. We might wait for few days before getting married." Her parents clearly started to look tense. Her Mom " What happened? I hope you are not changing your plans regarding your marriage since we will not permit it. I want to you to get married to that boy as soon as possible. After all you were wandering around the city with him." " Mom I was not wandering around city. I just went on few movies and ate few dinners." Mom asked her angrily " What else do you feel you need to bring bad reputation for you? " Dad " Now don't act like some stubborn girl. We have fixed your marriage with boy of your choice so marry with him and it will be over." Meena was so upset now. Her parents were just interested in finishing whole matter. She suddenly found a brilliant idea in her mind. Meena " And where did we stay? Are you going to lend us our flat?" Now this managed to confuse her parents. They didn't want to spare their investment on her. It was their security of old age. They couldn't give it to her. They needed it. They looked confused. Mom " You truly need it? Then we can give it." Dad nodded too. Meena " No need of sacrifice. We need to just wait with patience. Sunit told me. He will get flat in six months. We need to wait just for six months." Dad " Six months?!! This is long time." Mom " No one can get flat so quickly. But we need to do engagement at least." Meena was confused now. Meena decided that she could get engaged. Meena nodded. Then her parents decided to plan their engagement. Meena called Sunit and tell him her entire arrangement. Sunit agreed. Then he called Doctor. He took his appointment. He was so tense. He kept moving his hands. They were moving in perfect way. It was so strange. He didn't understand when it would start to happen. He couldn't move on some point. But sometimes he was perfect. He was so tense. He knew that it was happening with him again and again. He was not so nervous at beginning. He thought that it was some strange experience. He began to feel so happy from his soul. It was something so different like some paranormal experience. But then he slowly started to sense logical explanation it would be sickness. He began to study many books of diseases. He began to study them. He didn't want to just go to Doctor without guess. But step by step he began to sense there were many diseases which would look perfect for his sickness. He started to counting days of his life. He knew that he was going out with Meena which was wrong in his this condition but still he wanted to enjoy his life. He wanted to spend some time with his love. But sometimes he began to feel his love was selfish. He had to give freedom to Meena for her life. He began to feel that he was acting selfish by engaging to her. He needed to give her chance to enjoy her life. He knew what he supposed to do. He called on land line. Her Mom took his call. She was talking with him very sweetly. She was expecting him to become her son-in-law. He knew that it was artificial respect. She wanted him to get married with her daughter at any cost. He decided that he must tell truth. He sensed that this pleasant feeling was just artificial one. He knew that they would vanish when he would tell them truth. But he knew that it was important to all. He told every thing in just one breathe to Meena's Mom. Her Mom sounded angry " If you were sick why did you keep going out with Meena?" " I don't sense it on that time. Mommy." " Don't call me Mommy. I am not going to let my daughter marry you. I want you to stay away from her." " Sure. I can understand. Give my best wishes to Meena." " Sure her future will be best without you. You were just burden on our family. You were most poor son-in-law of our entire family." Sunit felt so hurt. He decided that he didn't want to hear more so he just disconnected call. He came out of room. He thought that he could tell his parents easily. But he started crying. His Dad and Mom was shocked. He was so glad that Satish was not there on that moment. Mom " What happened?" He sat down. Then he suddenly began to sense it again. He was no longer in his body. His Mom was touching him but he couldn't feel it. He felt as if his soul was standing out of his body. He was so upset. He could see his parents were crying. They were getting nervous. His Dad started to call Doctor. His Mom even slapped him to bring his senses back. But nothing was working. He was still out of his body which was worst news for him. But he was feeling nothing. His whole life suddenly became dream for him. He felt it was some performance which was happening before him. He didn't sense any pain out of it. He was just that way for some time. But when Doctor came to check, he was fine again. He began to feel every pain in his body. He was so confused. He told everything to Doctor. Doctor looked tense. He started to check his blood pressure. It was little high but not too much. Doctor started to give list of tests. Sunit just slept on bed. He sensed that he was sick so he had to make himself ready for sitting in hospital. His Mom looked at him with tense emotion but he returned it with smile. Sunit " I take few days off from office. After test we can move ahead. I will be fine. Mom. We must keep hope high on each point." His Mom nodded. Sunit closed his eyes and tried his best to reduce his fear.
After that Sunit started checking every thing. His physical fitness was confirmed. He was so confused. He was still facing physical trouble. He couldn't take bigger leave from office so he started to going in office. But he was so tense. Many times he just sat there without moving. Every thing began to become dream. It was worst when it happened in office. Finally one day Boss asked him. Boss " What is wrong with you? Why you keep sitting like that on some point? Don't you want to work here?" " No..no sir. I want to work.." He started typing as fast as possible. He began to work with more speed. Boss was looking so angry. He screamed loudly on him " I see it many times you just keep sitting while other person keep screaming. What is going on? Just tell me." Sunit was trying hard to control himself. He didn't want to cry before all staff of office. He just kept looking at other wall. But it didn't help him much. Slowly tears started to fall on his cheeks he couldn't control it at all. It was frustrating. He began to feel so upset. But Boss didn't sense it. Boss kept screaming on him until finally one of his colleagues interfered. " Sir he is sick." Boss " Sick? What happened to him? Why don't he take leave then?" " He is doing some tests so he is coming during that time and.." " I don't want a sick person in my office. Just get out." Sunit was so upset. He was sad as well as angry. He started to gather his stuff. He took every thing as fast as he could and just dash out of that door without any second thought. He didn't stop until he didn't reach on road. Then he sensed how lost his life was. He lost his love first. Since he knew that Meena was going to marry some one else soon. Now he had lost his job. Every thing was happening due to that strange sickness. Only if he didn't have those fits, it was getting worst day by day. He decided that instead of going back home. He should go to Doctor. He waited outside with patience until Doctor didn't call him. Finally receptionist told him " Doctor can see you now?" He just nodded and went inside. He was so depressed now that he just didn't understand how to tell Doctor his troubles. Slowly he told him all. Doctor " Can I suggest you something?" " Yes Doctor. I am totally desperate and open to all your suggestions." Doctor " Go to psychiatrist." Sunit was not open to this suggestion. Sunit " I am not mad and I am not doing this for attention." " Psychology is not that simple. Listen to me go to psychiatrist or you need to suffer more." He nodded. He took card. He once again took appointment. He sat outside. Now sitting outside Doctor's room become job to him. Then he sensed that he just lost his job so now this might become his only job. He started laughing by himself. But then soon he controlled himself. But he managed to create fear in other patients. He tried to convince all. " I am fine." But no one was ready to believe him. They managed to create quick appointment for him. When he went inside, he began to convince Psychiatrist that he was not mad. But when Psychiatrist started smiling, he sensed his mistake. Sunit smiled and said " I am mad." Psychiatrist " Not mad. You just have little mental disorder and tell me about it." He began to tell all to Psychiatrist. Psychiatrist kept nodding. "So can you identify this sickness?" " Yes I am." Sunit was shocked by psychiatrist's confidence. He never thought that he was having mental problem. " Can you tell me cause of it?" " Well your problem is depersonalization disorder. In this patient began to think that he was no longer inside his body. In case of cause we can't just point out one. I can see many causes of stress in your life. But we all have stress in life so what is use of blaming it. I just feel we need to find way to handle it." " But I don't understand why it is happening? I lost every hope of my life just due to this sickness and you are telling me that we must not search for cause. It was so frustrating. I need to find at least reason behind it. How can you cure it without understanding reason. I can't believe you can find way to cure me." He was screaming loudly. He was getting frustrated and angry. He didn't even sense when he started to scream so loudly that his voice started to go out. Suddenly Nurse opened small crack of door. " Every thing is alright." Sunit felt so ashamed. He started to apologizing Psychiatrist. Psychiatrist smiled " Just relax. This is happened due to stress." " Can you help me?" " Yes I can if you cooperate and keep faith on me." He nodded. Psychiatrist " Okay let me explain all to you." After that he started listening to Psychiatrist. When he went home, he was ready to start his fight with his trouble again. He was so confident. But when he saw his parents, he started to feel tense again. Then he reminded himself of those words which psychiatrist told him. He went inside. He told everything to his parents. They started creating issue but he just went inside room. He sat on internet and began searching for new job. He knew that he had to search for job. Then he received a call. It was from Meena. Meena " I want to meet you. I don't want to marry any one else." He started laughing. She was so confused. " Actually I lost my job today. I have learn my problem is mental." Meena didn't speak for some time. Then she talked " I want to talk with your Psychiatrist and I will wait for you until you don't get new decent job. I have waited for so long few months will not harm." " It might turn in years." Meena " Don't you understand my problem if I try to replace you I might not able to adjust with that new man for entire life so what is adjustment of few years." " Sorry. You are welcome back in my life but this route is not going to be pleasant." " But I am tough one. You know me." He laughed. Finally he got at least one good new. Meena " So we will get engaged and our marriage will wait." " Sure. I need you." Meena laughed. She felt so glad to hear this. First time he expressed his feeling. He sensed that Psychiatrist managed to help him little bit. He began to see ray of hope. He went out and told his parents that he was getting engaged. He didn't pay any attention to their objection. He went back to search for new job. He decided that he would start his life once again with Meena. This time he would make every thing right. He would not lose his second chance.
The End
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