Saturday, April 16, 2016

Adventure story 237. Mystery of darkness

                                                             Mystery of darkness
Reena looked around her room was full of light. She smiled. She got her room full of lights. She could feel as if she was in some dinner party. Her room was always full of lights. She looked at Ashutosh who was sleeping with covers on eyes. She felt so guilty. He had to sleep this way every night. She told him her this weakness before marriage but he agreed to accept it. She suggested that he could sleep in different room. But he said that he would sleep with her in her room. He started to sleep on that bed with cover on eyes. She liked him so much for his understanding. But when he started to get irritated by those covers. She just felt sorry from heart. She knew that it was all her fault. She went to drink some water. She was so thirsty sometimes at night. Then she once again went to sleep. She knew that it was too much. She had to stay in darkness for at least some moments. She decided that she would try so she went in bathroom and she switch off light. She suddenly began to feel that whole world around her was crazy. She began to so upset. She wanted to breathe but she couldn't. She did even sensed when she started screaming. Ashutosh came inside. Ashutosh " What is wrong with you? Why did you switch off toilet lights?" " My hand fell on it." She lied. She could see anger in Ashutosh's eyes. He was nice and kind man but when he needed to woke up like that in night. His temper was increased. Specially since he had decided to adjust so much. He wanted at least no noise at night. But if he said it was just mistake, she was sure that he would not make much issue. Her belief turned out to be true. He immediately took her in room. He told to sleep. Then he switched off light in bathroom. Ashutosh" Do you want to keep this light also open? In case you want to go in rest room in night again?" He was so kind. But she didn't want to waste so much money. " No need. I will open door and let this light come inside." "Great. But I don't want to hear more screams at night. Try to understand tomorrow I need to go in office. I need my sleep." Reena said " Sorry." She closed her eyes in tight way. She was so upset. She just couldn't close light. But then she decided that she would think about it later. She didn't want to upset Ashutosh more. She wanted to cry. She wanted to stop getting scared. She always felt so inferior about it. She worked on every point in life. She tried to understand every thing in life but every one would sense her weakness after some time and take revenge on her. She remembered every time how did she managed to get in some room and then it suddenly began dark. If some one wanted to defeat her that was just best trick in her life. She never managed to do well in any competition. She was good in many sides but she never managed to get good out of it. When she tried to remove her fear of darkness  She was so upset by it. But she knew that she couldn't control it. She started crying in such slow voice so that no one could hear her. She was so upset. Soon Ashutosh sensed his mistake. Ashutosh " I am sorry. I just got too angry." "It was not your mistake. It is all mistake of my sickness." She started  crying more now. He tried his best to console her. But it was not working. Ashutosh " Why are you trying to fight against it? Every one have some fear. You can keep your fear. Just don't try to fight them. I don't want you to get so tense. Can you imagine how scared I was when I heard your screams just ignore them!! Promise me?" She nodded and promised. She decided that they would adjust with that darkness.
     Reena adjusted very well with her life. But she could sense one thing her fear was not reduced. Ashutosh was still okay with it. She avoided all night parties. He went to each and he came back with happy face. He never complaint. Every thing seemed okay until one day her friend taunted on phone. Kira " Reena you gave Ashutosh full freedom. I mean last night I saw him in one party. He was dancing with another woman." "Dancing?" " Yes. We all were dancing and enjoying. But we all were with partners. As usual Ashutosh was alone. I just thought that it was wrong. So on same moment I spotted his cousin. I thought she would dance with him since she was maternal cousin and unmarried but then I was shocked when I noticed. He had partner. Can you believe it? He had his partner all along. Ashutosh seemed to dance with her in every party. She is a widow. She married to some old man. She claimed for love, people said for money. That man was of her father's age. Any way when she became widow, people thought that she would remarry. But she never did that. But she started going to parties. She became social. But instead of dancing with eligible men. She started dancing with your husband. I know people get friendly now a days. But this was too much." She said it in such strange way that Reena felt so scared.But she knew that she must not trust Kira. Kira had habit of exaggerating every thing. But she had to confirm. She decided that she would better ask Ashutosh directly. But it was so scary. Then she decided that she might check in his cupboard. She search in his cupboard. It just had her few things. She didn't locate anything of any body else. She was so confused. Then she suddenly remembered that necklace which he brought for her on valentine day. It was so beautiful as if some woman helped him to choose it. She was so shocked and hurt. She could clear to see that she was getting every gift with her help. She called Ashutosh " Are you going to party with some woman? Are you cheating me?" "What? After tolerating you so much you are insulting me like that? I went to party so then what I suppose to do? Just stood in corner. I didn't do any dance which was embarrassing. We are just doing couple dance in which couple suppose to take normal steps. I just never felt that you are so orthodox in thinking. I just hate you." Then he switched off his mobile. She kept calling him but he just didn't answer. She was so upset. He was having affair. She was married to him for six months but she couldn't imagine her life without him. But if he was having affair then he might want to leave her. She could feel that he might be getting bored of her. She had that darkness fear. Suddenly she began to feel strange in her stomach. She ran in bathroom. She thought that she was sick. Then she suddenly thought that she might be pregnant. She was so happy and scared at same time. She immediately called her Mom. They decided to visit Doctor. After all it could be just stomach trouble. She totally forgot her argument with Ashutosh in that issue. When she came back home, she was on top of the world. But then she looked at Ashutosh's angry face and she remembered every thing. He came towards her Mom and she sensed that he was going to complaint to her Mom. But then she felt that it was better to get advise of elder on this issue so she just kept quiet. After all her phobia was genetic, her Mom had it. She must had got in some genes which passed her by her Mom.
    But when Ashutosh came near his Mom, he smiled. He touched her feet. He began to talk very sweetly. Reena was so shocked. He was happy when her Mom pointed her to tell him. She told him about their baby. He looked on top of the world. Then as soon as her Mom went away, he came near her. Reena was happy but she has suspicion now. Why didn't she told that matter to Mom? She could see it in his eyes. He smiled. Ashutosh " I don't want to drag this matter more. I mean we have to shut this thing up totally. I will just stop attending parties then it all will over. Okay." She nodded. But she was having so many doubts in mind. She was not sure that he would honestly act this way. But from that day she began center point of every thing. He never once went to party. She was so upset that she got suspicious and now she wanted to judge it all by herself. She started to feeling guilty for looking at him with doubt. Then one day Kira called her again. Kira pretended that she was concerned about her health and baby. But Reena knew her so well. She knew that it was about gossip. Kira talked about many things at first. Then finally she came on point. Kira " Actually I was wrong about that woman last time. She was not that widow. She was another woman.." Reena interrupted " I don't care I trust my husband. In fact I told him that he could dance with anyone. It look so odd if he didn't dance. I am not of that type who get so upset on such small matter." Reena lied but she wanted to upset Kira so much. Kira started laughing. Kira " I know why did you get upset if your husband is dancing with doctor of mad people. " " Doctor of mad people? " " What did call them?.." Kira pretended as if she didn't remember that word. But Reena knew that she knew all. " Of course psychiatrist. I don't know what they were talking about. But I feel it must be you. I mean you can't go out in dark. It is not normal. He wanted normal life for himself. How long can he tolerate it?" Reena was so shocked to hear this. She was so angry. Her husband Ashutosh was discussing her madness with others. He was calling her mad. She was pregnant. She must not get excited on any point. But she could sense that her anger was rising. She knew that she had to control it. But she was so upset. That she just called Asuhutosh and started screaming. Ashutosh tried to calm her down. But she didn't. Then she suddenly felt some pain in her stomach, She felt scared. She was upset. She began feel scared that she might lose her baby. It was so worst. Ashutosh told her to go in bedroom and just sleep. She did that. Soon her neighbor came who called, Doctor who gave her medicine. After that they told her to take total bed rest so she just kept sleeping in room which was full of light. Ashutosh took special care of that. He didn't want to complicate her pregnancy. He was scared. He just apologized and told her. She was getting so upset that night when she tried to get in dark so he just thought. But she told him. She didn't want to discuss that matter. After that she just tried to not think about it. Slowly her anger was reduced. Her Mom pointed out that Kira was doing all to disturb her marriage even if Ashutosh did that it was small mistake, nothing big. It was like asking Doctor in party regarding some allergy. Reena was consoled. She began to just think about their happy married life and their baby. Ashutosh was also happy since she started to get healthy and normal soon. They were excited about their baby so much. They just discussed about baby.
    As days went ahead Reena's life just began to move only around baby. Finally her baby girl was born. She was so beautiful. Every one jumped with joy. She kept looking at her baby. She was beautiful. Her daughter was fine during day. But as night came she started crying. Reena started to try her best to console her. But she just kept crying. Then suddenly Nurse came inside. Nurse " My god. Those lights are hurting eyes of baby. She wanted to sleep peaceful in dark at night." "Dark!! I can't stay in dark." "What? I don't get it." Reena's Mom " Actually we are scared of dark." " Okay then keep that little bulb on. Then baby can sleep."Reena " No..No..that small light is not enough for me." Reena was so scared. Nurse " How can you act so selfish? Your daughter is crying. This light might hurt her eyes." Reena " Then I want one more room." Nurse " How can such small baby stay without Mom." Reena started crying " Please try to understand I can't stay in darkness." Nurse was so confused when Doctor entered " What happened?" Nurse explained it all. Doctor looked at Reena with tense expressions. Doctor " If you have so strong phobia, why don't you took treatment from psychiatrist? Now your child will have to suffer because of you." Reena felt so sad. Ashutosh was right. There was no shame in taking treatment. He didn't care about his reputation and tried. But she didn't cooperated and now this was happening. It looked so wrong. She started crying. Doctor " Now don't get upset. I will bring doctor but you need to keep baby with nurse. Even at home you need sleep. " Then they took away baby. Nurse " I will bring her for feeding." She nodded. She immediately called Ashutosh. She told him every thing. But she was crying uncontrollably. Ashutosh sounded angry " Now stop crying. What is use of crying now? I sensed it. You need of lights increasing over limit and you can't just stop it like just going it darkness. You were killing yourself by that way." Reena started crying more. Ashutosh " Now relax. I am not that scary as father. I will take good care of her at nights. Now relax. I will bring doctor tomorrow. " She tried to relax but sleep seemed to gone far away. Her Mom " I just never have problem that big. If I had, I would have warn you." "Mom stop blaming yourself. It was not your mistake. You was suggested but I just didn't listen." She slept on bed. She decided to relax. She knew that her daughter need her. She had to be healthy. She decided that tomorrow she would cooperate with psychiatrist. She would start to understand those thoughts. She needed to be fine and well for her daughter. Not just physically but mentally as well. She felt only if she sensed this before but then she decided that she must relax now since her tomorrow was going to be big day. She looked at those lights. She never sensed when her need of lights increased so much that she didn't able to stay in even small light. Those lights were really too bright. She sensed one thing from mind. She needed to be cured and she needed to understand it. She closed her eyes. But she knew that her night was going to be full on nightmares and intervals when her daughter came for milk. She was so scared that these lights might hurt her. But then she saw that nurse brought her daughter with covers on eyes. She felt so sad. Her daughter was not going to see her on that first night. It was so hard for her. She cried so hard on night. She wanted to control but couldn't.
    Next morning when Reena woke up, her daughter was in arms. She was so beautiful. She took her in hands. She was her most precious treasure. She didn't want to keep her away in nights. She didn't want to harass her with lights. She began to sense once again tears were forming in her eyes. It was so wrong. She wanted to smile for her daughter. When Ashutosh entered with a beautiful looking woman. She smiled at her. "Hello Reena, now don't worry. We will handle your problem slowly. " "But I have to stay without my daughter." "For few months. Not for entire life and she is so small that she will not even remember it. But if you don't do it now then she will suffer for whole life." Reena nodded. Reena " I am so glad that she didn't took my genes.." "What genes? Phobia of dakeness. It is called Achluphobia. It is not about genes. We want to safe from our subconscious mind. Fear is that emotion which indicates to us that some thing evil is going to happen around us. That emotion is created for us to keep us same. But sometimes some thing bad happens in darkness and we unconsciously stick it with darkness. That darkness was not cause of fear but just one factor which was existed on that point. But in your case your fear is clearly shifted from your Mom." Then psychiatrist turned to Reena's Mom who was shivering with fear at mention of some incidence. " Madam can you tell me about your trauma?" "I don't want to." Her Mom just looked at psychiatrist with anger. " You are a stupid woman. I don't think you can able to help her. In fact I feel you are here to prove my daughter mad. I think Ashutosh might want to marry you." Reena screamed on Mom " Shut up. How could you insult her like that? Apologize." "I will not and if you take treatment from her. I will cut all relation with you." Ashutosh " Are you out of your mind? You are deserting your daughter since she decide to go to psychiatrist." " She is no longer my daughter." Her Mom just went out of room Reena was so shocked. But psychiatrist patted on her shoulder " Just relax. That trauma which your mother seem to suffer is something she didn't want to discuss. We can't help her unless she want it. But she had managed to shift her fear in you." Reena was so angry. Reena " She did this to me.." "No..No don't take it in wrong way. She did just because she wanted to protect you. Just like today she went away since she knew that you are in safe hands. She wanted to hide her secret. No need to disturb it. But we can correct her mistake. I am here to help you." Reena nodded. From that day she started to do just as per instructions of psychiatrist. She was discharged very soon. But her Mom never visited her. In fact her Mom sold her flat and went away. She didn't even tell any body where she was. It was so strange but any way Reena went ahead with her life. She took treatment. Slowly she started to stay in less light. Finally one day she managed to sleep in dark with her daughter and Ashutosh. Next day they threw party for her success. Reena thought that it was embarrassing at first but then agreed. In that party they dance in just candle light. It was their first candle light dinner and their one year old daughter joined them with sleepy eyes. Every one else congratulated her even Kira said few good words. Only her Mom was missing and with her that piece of mystery always remained hidden regarding what happened in darkness. But any way Reena decided to move ahead in life as per her psychiatrist's guidelines. She tried to search her Mom. She found her mobile number but when her Mom disconnected and finally blocked her number. She went ahead with her life. After all she couldn't stop her life to console madness of her Mom. So her Mom never came back. She just vanished like fear of darkness from life. That life!! It give happiness and sorrows side by side.
                                                                   The End

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