Shivering in cold
Rita started to think about different movies which she could see. It was important for her that she must select what all liked. She personally preferred old classic but she knew that her kids or youngsters didn’t like them. She wanted to go to movie with all families. Her family included all her relatives which included her husband’s two sisters & one brother. Then their children were welcomed too. She knew that she needed to book at least one row. But she was not sure. It might become extra. She was not sure their children would come. Last time she remembered that they were at least twenty people. But this time she didn’t know. She selected movie which she liked last time but she was not appreciated at all. They all wanted different things. They kept demanding them. She was so tense. She sensed one thing on that day. Going to movie with family was not easy. She was carefully thinking about movie name. She began to search about them. She was reading about them. But all advertisements managed to show that their movie was excellent. She was watching every star of that movie. She was studying all about them. All those stars seemed not such promising to her. She looked towards one advertisement. She decided to purchase tickets. Then she shifted to another advertisement. She didn’t feel sure about them. She began to think that she needed to study those movies. She needed to understand their subject. She kept searching. Finally she sensed that she was too late for cooking lunch. She didn’t kept cook since she knew that she could handle cooking herself in better way. She was sure that she would manage all. But then in few moments she began to get uncertain. She knew one thing on that point she needed to cook. She went in kitchen. She began to arrange all items. She needed to cook properly but she had much long practice of cooking that automatically her hands began to cook in right way. Her mind was entire on movies. She needed to decide one movie. Then she began to think that she might needed to read review or little bit of story. She wanted to get involved in movie before she would show it to anyone. Then she sensed that she needed to cook quickly if she wanted to do that so she began to cook as fast as possible. She began to arrange all food on table. She placed all dishes properly. She didn’t even considered that she was making that entire table ready for her son who was school boy & hardly ate on table. He always took his lunch plate in hall & sat before TV to eat. She didn’t understand that she did decoration of table unnecessarily. Then she went in her room. She searched for her mobile. She took it out. Then one by one she began to search for movies. Then slowly she found information. She sensed that she could see trial of movies too. She began to see of first movie. She sensed that it was nothing as she wished. She was so glad that she had not booked tickets of this movie. Then she wrote under comment that she didn’t like that movie that much. She began to search for next movie. It was so important to find a worthy movie. She needed to study all movies on newspaper. She carefully started to watch trials. She kept watching them one by one. Soon she began to get so confused. She sensed that she didn’t like any movie. It was odd. It seemed as if they were no longer creating nice & promising movies. She felt so sad. This movie was not moving ahead the way it should. Most of the movies moved entirely in wrong direction. She kept watching all movies with hope. She didn’t understand where did she would find proper movie which she needed to study. She needed to study different concepts & stories. She was so disappointed by all movie trials that she saw. That she began to feel hopeless. She didn’t sense when she started to cry because of it. She came to senses when door bell rang. She sensed that her son Tarun came home from school. She began to tell him to come on table to eat. Tarun looked confused. Tarun “ Mom I will change my clothes take wash then sat before TV to watch programme when you give me lunch! I never sat on table.” He ran towards kitchen & he was totally shocked when he saw his Mom arranged all table for him. It was so odd. Tarun “ Mom why did you done all this?” Rita gave nervous smile. Rita “ I thought you might like to be treated like adult.” “ Adult? Even Dad don’t sit on table like that anymore. What were you thinking when you were doing this?!” She took deep breath that she sensed that she couldn’t hide anything from her Son. She decided to tell “ Actually I was thinking about movies.” “ Movies? What? I don’t get it!” “ Do you remember last time we went to one movie with entire family?!” She hoped that Tarun remembered it positively. Tarun kept thinking. He said “ I don’t remember.” Rita was so shocked. She began to describe entire event. “ Remember all your Uncles & Aunties came with cousins. I made chicken & soup & salad & in veg I made paneer makhani..” “ Mom you always make tasty things. I admire your cooking but I don’t remember that day.” Tarun was shocked to see Rita’s Anxiety. He didn’t understand why did this event so special. “ Mom I don’t remember that party. It is not so important. I am hungry. Bring some thing to eat.” Tarun ran in his room to take wash & change his clothes. Normally Rita instructed him to do it. But today she was concerned just about finding one right type of movie. She went in kitchen. She started to arrange food for Tarun. She began to get tense. She wanted to prepare all perfectly for Tarun. She didn’t understand what he would like to eat. She looked lunch but she was so confused. Tarun came out running. Tarun looked towards her. Tarun “ What happened? Give me something to eat.” “ I cooked this but do you like it?” Tarun “ Of course.” Tarun decided to not wait. He took one plate & took his lunch. He went in hall & started TV. Once again he was happy & laughing. He was relaxing for hour after school then he needed to start his study again. It was his daily routine. One hour relaxation after school then he returned back to study. He totally ignored what Rita was doing.
Rita was so upset. She wanted to make her son Tarun happy. But she didn’t manage to serve him food on time. She began to feel so useless. She needed to make Tarun happy. She didn’t want her husband Pradip to feel he did big mistake by marrying her. She saw many times people saying these things. It was so sad. She didn’t want her husband Pradip to say it. She ran in hall. She took out sweets she saved for herself. She smiled & gave them to Tarun. “ Do you want this?” Tarun looked towards her & felt shocked by this new treat from his mother. He gave sweet smile & said “ Thanks.” He was so happy to eat them. He didn’t understand why did his Mom was gifting him this way. But he welcomed it. Then she went inside. She went in her room. She began to sense that it was too dirty. She decided that she needed to clean it. She began to clean her room. It was so upsetting. She never sensed that so much things were not properly organised. She managed to keep things in wrong way. She began to set them all in right way. She needed to arrange them all properly. Then she needed to clean her tiles properly. She didn’t need stain in her flooring. She noticed many dots. They were so disgusting. She needed to become perfect wife who cleaned everything. She wanted to keep everything tidy. She began to clean it. She was so exhausted. She looked towards time. It was so late. She totally forgot to clean pots after lunch. She even didn’t ask Tarun if he wanted anything. She ran in kitchen. She sensed that Pots were waiting for her in washbasin & her son was already sitting in his room & studying. Tarun was not naughty boy. Tarun always did his homework on time. She never received any complaint about Tarun. She went to kitchen to clean pots. Then she cleaned table. She began to set all properly when her mobile rang. It was her mother-in-law. She took call. “ Yes Mommy!” “ Well do you remember that we need to arrange that movie for all family.” “ Yes..yes.” Her mother-in-law stayed with her only. She wanted one flat for herself but sadly they never managed to get enough amount or Pradip never desired to live separately. She didn’t know what was cause. But it was not happening. She knew that she needed to adjust. She sensed that after some efforts she might manage to adjust. She needed to adjust in life. She smiled & asked her mother-in-law “ When will you reach home?” “ Soon.” Actually her mother-in-law went to a wedding with her sister. Her father-in-law died in few years after her marriage. She felt on that point she must not discuss shifting to different house. She knew her mother-in-law needed her. Her mother-in-law was nice lady. She knew sometimes she acted little bossy but it was common. She knew that it was expected from any mother-in-law. She knew that her mother-in-law must be in Taxi & returned home soon. She knew that she needed to set table again. She sensed that she didn’t cook afternoon snacks. She literally ran in kitchen. She began to arrange all items needed for cooking tasty snacks. She started to do it. She began to feel so nice by smell of food. It was so nice. It was making her hungry. She knew that her mother-in-law would like it. She cooked it. Then she arranged table once again. Tarun came in kitchen & looked towards her with shock. “ Mom why did you arrange table again?” “ Your grandma is coming.” “ Ohh but she never insists on table.” She felt so confused now. “ Do you feel I should not arrange table?” Tarun smiled & said “ Don’t worry. Grandma will like it.” He went away. She kept getting tense again & again. It was so upsetting. She wanted to do all in perfect way. She needed to make her mother-in-law happy. She began to look towards door. Then suddenly door bell rang. She went there & opened door. She was so nervous when she saw her mother-in-law. Her mother-in-law gave her odd look. Mother-in-law asked “ What happened? Why you are looking towards me this way?” “ Nothing. Come in.” She took out suitcases from her mother-in-law. She immediately went inside & looked inside suitcase. There were plenty of clothes inside it. Those clothes were full of different type & looks. She opened cupboard & began to arrange those clothes properly inside. Then she sensed that she forgot to ask her mother-in-law for permission. She went out & asked “ Mom I am arranging your clothes is it okay?” Her mother-in-law smiled & said “ Of course. Thanks!” She nodded & went back to arrange them again. It was all arranged properly. Then she sensed that she didn’t serve her mother-in-law properly. She came out. Her Mother-in-law was already sitting on table. Her mother-in-law was eating happily. When she saw Rita, she immediately said “ Wow you learn to cook better. It can’t stop myself from admiring it.” Her mother-in-law was not easy to please but she managed to do it. She supposed to feel happy but she was feeling so tense. She felt that it was about movie. She decided to tell her mother-in-law about it. She began to tell her mother-in-law how hard she was trying to find some nice movie. Her mother-in-law started to look tense too. “ It seem as if it is going to be hard for her.” Then her mother-in-law’s mobile rang. Her mother-in-law kept talking on mobile for long time. It was so odd. But Rita felt that it was her duty to stand near her mother-in-law whole time. Her mother-in-law gave her upsetting look & asked “ What happened?” She smiled & said “ Nothing.” She just kept standing then suddenly Tarun said loudly “ Mom Grandma need privacy! Go away!” She felt so embarrassed. Her mother-in-law smiled & said “ It’s okay.” But she understood his point. She gave nervous smile & ran towards kitchen while doing it she dumped herself to cupboard & managed to throw away on flowerpot. She placed it back. But she sensed that it was already broken. She began to cry. She was doing all wrong. Her mother-in-law got irritated. “ It was nice showpiece. You are so clumsy.” She felt so sad. She didn’t understand how could she learn to act perfect. It was so irritating. She kept doing all wrong.
Rita cleaned mess & ran inside her room. She needed to decide movie. She told herself that everything would perfect. She started to search for movies. She needed to select movie. She began to observe every poster carefully. She kept looking towards trials. She was so confused. She didn’t understand what she needed to decide to give importance in movie. She began to feel so restless. She was trying so hard. Then suddenly her mother-in-law started knocking door. She opened it. Her mother-in-law kept looking towards with shock. “ What happened? Why you are looking so sick? Are you crying?!..come on that flowerpot was not so important. It’s okay.” Her mother-in-law touched her cheek with affection. Her mother-in-law seemed more tense. “ What happened? Why your skin is so cold? Are you scared?” She smiled & said “ No..no I am just fine.” She went back to searching of movies. She needed to find a perfect movie. Her mother-in-law joined her search too. She didn’t understand why but she was feeling so scared. She might make some noise like coughing etc. but she was okay. She didn’t got cold. She didn’t understand why she felt so scared. Her mother-in-law was looking towards her kindly. She didn’t sense why she was feeling so upset. She started to shiver slowly. Her mother-in-law looked so upset. “ My God you are shivering.” She smiled & said “ It’s okay.” She began to search for jacket. She was using it whenever she felt cold. Her mother-in-law looked totally nervous when she took out jacket. “ Do you feel cold like this always?” “ Yes..yes!” She wanted to answer in different way but she couldn’t. She felt so upset. She was truly feeling so cold. It was so upsetting. She didn’t want to feel that way but she didn’t help herself. She was feeling so cold. Her teethes were making odd sound. She was getting so restless. Her mother-in-law buttoned her jacket & said “ Let’s go to Doctor.” “ But what about that movie?” “ Come on. I don’t want you to search for movie or plan that function while you are sick?!” “ I don’t understand. I mean people will get upset.” “ It doesn’t matter!” Then her mother-in-law started calling Tarun. When Tarun came in room, her Mother-in-law told him that she was sick. Tarun immediately sensed that they were going to Doctor. He immediately brought her purse & said “ Don’t worry Mom. I will lock door & be careful.” She nodded. She didn’t understand why she was feeling so scared. She wanted to feel confident. But she was shivering on every moment. They sat in Doctor’s line. After long time their number came. Doctor began to check her. Doctor checked her again & again. Finally Doctor said “ I don’t see sign of cough or cold or even virus. I don’t understand why she is feeling so cold! Did something happened that managed to scare her so much?” Her mother-in-law turned head towards Rita. Rita smiled & said “ Nothing different. I was just planning movie in theatre for entire family.” “ This can’t scare you so much! There must be some other cause.” She began to get so tense. She kept thinking. “ I don’t remember anything.” She didn’t say anything since she didn’t know anything. Her life was perfect. She knew nothing was wrong with her life. Pradip gave her all. She gave nervous smile & said “ All is perfect with me.” Her mother-in-law didn’t know anything. But her mother-in-law noticed the way Pradip kept screaming on her. Pradip was drinking daily now. Her mother-in-law wanted to stop him. She even tried to convince him. But Pradip always gave her sweet smile & said “ Don’t worry Mom. I am okay. I don’t drink daily.” Her mother-in-law decided to tell Doctor “ Actually now a days Pradip is drinking daily.” As soon as her sentence was over. Rita started to shiver in strange way. Doctor immediately told her to put on extra sweater which she brought with her. Doctor slowly turned towards his table. Then on sheet of paper he wrote something. Rita felt that it was just name of medicine & it would be over soon. But then Doctor told her mother-in-law “ This is name of Psychiatrist. You must take her to him. This is happening due to mental issue. She is having nervous breakdown.” Rita began to feel more upset. She tried to smile. She began to convince herself that she was not feeling cold. She started to get so stressed. She decided to go home. She smiled to Doctor thanked him & went away. Her mother-in-law kept looking towards her. Then she asked Doctor regarding his fees. She gave him those fees & Doctor also prescribed medicine for temporary relief. Her mother-in-law sensed that Rita was not going to get convinced so soon. It was going to become big trouble for her. Rita went home & tried to remove clothes but her shivering just continued. She began to feel so sick & upset. She decided that she needed to control her fears. She felt so tense. She didn’t understand cause of her fear. She didn’t know. But then on some point she knew. Pradip was talking daily to his new friend. He called her friend but she knew that it was more than that. That girl was married so Pradip couldn’t marry her but she knew that he was in love with that girl. Every day he was talking to her. That girl could call him at nights too. She wanted to object but it was not possible. She felt so tense & upset. She tried her best to control her fear. She tried her best to herself that it was mental. But she couldn’t. She started crying loudly. Finally when Pradip came, her mother-in-law told all to him. He began to scream on her. He was so abusive that her mother-in-law told Rita to sleep with her. It was so stressful. Finally angry Pradip went to sleep while Rita kept looking towards ceiling for entire night. Next morning Tarun requested her. “ Mom go to Psychiatrist. I need you. Mom you can see how does Dad act? You are precious to me!” She nodded & agreed. She went to her mother-in-law & took appointment of psychiatrist. She decided to move ahead. She didn’t say anything to anyone.
On appointment of psychiatrist Rita went there. She decided that she would tell all to psychiatrist. She was still shivering. Psychiatrist stopped air conditioner for her. She smiled happily when he did it. She couldn’t stand that cold. Then she slowly told all. “ Pradip kept talking with that girl whole time..” she told him everything. She was still shivering but she was feeling little bit less cold. Psychiatrist gave her some medicine. Then Psychiatrist told her “ You are feeling this cold due to odd behaviour of your husband. You are feeling scared of his criticism. He didn’t have direct affair so you can’t say it to anyone but you are suffering pain of that wife whose husband have affair or second wife. This woman has become your husband’s second wife on mental level. But don’t worry step by step you will learn to handle this Anxiety disorder would be reduced. Just don’t worry. You need to learn to live for your happiness now.” She nodded happily. She was shivering but she decided to concentrate on her life. She came home. She slowly suggested Pradip that she would shift in Tarun’s room since she didn’t want AC. Pradip nodded. She shifted all. Pradip started to live in his room happily. Rita kept staying in Tarun’s room. Soon she sensed that Pradip was not interested in her at all. She decided to let go her life ahead. Slowly due to treatment she began to get relaxed. Finally one day she stopped feeling cold. She stopped her treatment. But one day when Pradip came with Divorce paper, she felt little bit shivering. But she agreed & went ahead with procedure. She got little bit upset but not too much. She sensed one thing that she was strong now. She took alimony & flat which Pradip offered. His Mom decided to live with her so she stayed in her mother-in-law’s house. So Rita got two flat one which Pradip offered & other in which she lived with mother-in-law. She happily accepted what she got. She began to live her life as Divorcee. It was hard but not so hard. She lived happily with her son Tarun & her mother-in-law. She never missed her husband & never felt cold until weather get cold.
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