Painting of her room
Dipti was working hard to get things as per her choice. Until now she never managed to get anything as she wanted. It was always wanted to get as per her choice but sadly her parents always decided all for her. It was frustrating for her. She never get freedom like other girls. While other schoolmates went wherever want she supposed to go to limited places. She knew that her life was limited to few areas of map. She was not permitted to go out of them. She always told to stay inside them. She felt as if those areas were her cage. She wanted to go out of them but her parents considered it too risky. She felt so nervous about all. She didn't understand if her parents were acting overprotective or her friends were acting careless. She didn't understand what was truth of her life. She just sensed one thing that she was not getting freedom. She needed to fight for it. From that day she was fighting every day to get things for her choice. Today was one more day. They were planning to paint their house. She wanted one room to get colour of her choice. She knew that it was impossible but she at least wanted to get colour which would give pleasant feel to her mind. She wanted to decide all but she knew her Dad just gave her three colours & she needed to choose one out of them. She never had much options. Her Dad always circled three colours & she needed to decide one out of them. Even it was to decide that one. It was not easy for her. She kept fighting again & again for getting that choice. She needed to help a lot while doing colouring but she didn’t even get chance to choose colour. She was so upset. She came out & started arguing. “ I want to choose that colour.” She was saying it in anger. Every one started looking towards her with dislike. She knew that her style of talking seemed like arrogant. She didn’t like the way people were taking away her freedom. She worked so hard to get things done. No one was there to help her. They didn’t pay attention how much time she was working since no one knew about it. According to them she was rich so she had servants. But truthfully her servants were not doing it. It was so strange. Her servant felt that she needed to work hard instead of them. Her parents felt that they kept servants. Sometimes she felt that getting rid of servants was better option. She demanded just selection of one colour for her own room still she was not getting it. Her Dad immediately said “ Look at her. She is so mannerless. You need to taught manners to her.” “ But I want to just choose one colour for my room. It wasn’t big thing to ask.” Painter “ But your Dad is paying so he can decide all. You need to give respect to him.” She just nodded & went out of room. Soon her Dad decided colour of her room too. Her Dad was clearly saying many things against her. So she didn’t got right to choose room colour & she was abused for trying it. She sensed that painter was more talented than her. She knew that she didn’t able to paint herself but she removed lots of furniture for free while painter charged money for moving every furniture. It was so upsetting. She needed to work so hard for it but in return she got nothing. She went back to her room. She cried slowly. She didn’t want anyone to hear it otherwise they would call her weak. She needed to show that she was strong. She wanted to work hard to get things painted properly. She wanted to make her room perfect. But she never thought that even painter would taunt her. She knew that it was not right to taunt anyone on financial status but this painter taunted her on her unemployment so it was about her financial position too. It seemed that it was okay to taunt her. She was so upset. She knew that now they would do that room with colour which her Dad wanted. She opened her laptop. She was lucky to get this one. She never understood how did she managed to get this. It was her lucky day. But she got one. She was happy about it. She managed to make new friends on it. She began to type her troubles on it. Soon she sensed that other people had their own troubles too. She started to feel relaxed. She told herself that she needed to control her anger. She came out. She saw her Dad had selected colour of painting for wall. She didn’t say anything just smiled. She looked towards mother & said “ This colour is nice too.” Her mother returned smile & said “ Yes..yes it will bring more light in room.” She could clearly see in her mother’s eyes that she wanted something different but she couldn’t do it. She smiled & told her Mom “ It’s alright. We can adjust.” Her Mom nodded happily. She knew that her Mom wanted to change all but it was not possible. Her Mom didn’t have much financial support & her Dad managed to get all under his control. She had a younger brother. Her Dad was fond of him. He kept talking about him only. He permitted him to choose colour of his room. But her brother was not interested. Her brother never spent much time in house. He hated his house. He wanted to shift to some big mansion. Some astrologer told them that he would become rich one day. They all felt so happy about it. She was never happy about it. Since she knew that it suggested that she would get nothing & he would get everything. Her brother didn’t want anything from that house. He was in search of some rich girl. It was clear that he wanted a rich wife. She saw how did her brother dance around rich girls like their pet. She tried to say something about it but her father gave her angry & said “ You should be doing same thing instead of taunting him! You can never able to earn money! You are so stupid.” She was so shocked. She never thought that she needed to please rich boys to earn money! Her idea of life was different. She wanted to marry for love but all laughed on that concept. But she knew one thing that how much might her brother try still those rich girls would never marry him. Those rich girls wanted love & money too. Her brother was clearly not in love & he didn’t have money. But in her father’s eyes he was smart so he kept appreciating him. She decided to ignore it. But when she was not permitted to decide colour of her room & he was asking again & again about it. She felt hurt. She didn’t like it.
Dipti kept smiling throughout day. She tried to smile & show off that everything was perfect. But in her heart she knew that it was not. She tried her best to act like perfect daughter but she was not. She had her defects. She get angry when she started to not get things as she wished. She wanted all as per her choice in her room. She didn’t like it when someone entered in her room. But her father didn’t like idea of giving her so much freedom. He kept coming in her room. He kept checking around. She didn’t understand what he was searching in her room. She didn’t like it. It was so frustrating. But she knew that she must not question her father. He could search in her things. He must be confirming that she was not involved with someone. She knew that it was his responsibility. She needed to not get involved with any boy. It was not reputable for her. She knew that she must wait until suitable age. Her father kept confirming from time to time about her attitude. She never objected. She didn’t have anything to hide. But she sensed one thing that no one searched her brother’s room same way. She felt so upset by all. She kept thinking why they had just suspicion of her. She never talked with boys that much. She was just interested in studies & drawing. She began to draw whenever she felt upset. She learnt to click photos of her drawings . She even began to put picture on her account. Slowly lot of people began to admire his drawings. She kept watching it carefully. She wanted to pay attention to every part of drawing. She needed it in hopeful way. She wanted to make it nice. She did it carefully. She began to do colouring in proper angle. It was so nice. It was relaxing. She was hoping in her heart somewhere that she could get it right. She wanted to forget all her sorrows by painting it. She knew that it was hard but it was essential. She needed work way with which she could achieve success. She felt that these paintings would give it. Then suddenly her Mom entered in her room. Her Mom gave sweet smile & said “ Your Jatin Uncle is coming for dinner. Ravi will come with him too. You like to chat with Ravi; don’t you?” She nodded happily. Ravi was nice boy. He told her plenty of things about world. Actually Ravi was permitted to wander in world while she was stuck in home. It was frustrating that she didn’t know much about world. Ravi kept telling her different stories about places he visited. He told about books he read. She enjoyed it. She smiled happily. She liked idea of spending time with Ravi. She nodded “ That is great!” She was so happy to get change. Then her Mom selected a nice dress for her. She supposed to get dress up. It was routine whenever Ravi came she always got dressed up. It was happening from childhood. She kept getting dress up & looked beautiful for Ravi. She could go to some cafe with Ravi. It was permitted. She liked it too. She wanted to go to cafe & enjoy snacks while chatting. She never thought that she wanted to have different choice than Ravi. She always felt that her parents were happy to have Ravi. Her father was fond of Ravi. Her Mom gave dress & she got dressed up. But this time she observed. Her Mom was not so happy. It seemed as if her Mom was stressed about something. Her Mom didn’t want to tell something but her Mom needed to. Her Mom “ What do you feel about Ravi?” She gave confused look. She didn’t understand question. “ I mean do you want to marry him one day?” Now this was shocking for her. She never expected this. It was so confusing. She wanted to feel relaxed but she was not feeling it. She was feeling angry. She never liked Ravi that much. But she didn’t want to reject him. She gave her Mom angry look. “ Mom Ravi doesn’t look towards me that way.” Her Mom looked relaxed. Mom “ I thought same thing. It’s your Dad’s idea that he is in love with you.” She immediately rejected that thought. Then she got dressed up. She didn’t like Ravi that much. He was nice boy but she never felt that they had any love between them. She rejected that idea. But when she came out, her Dad gave sweet smile. Her brother joined him too. They both started telling how much excited Ravi was to meet her. She began to feel that Ravi might be in love with her. She was confused. She began to like that idea. She wanted some one to fall in love with her. She didn’t sense like colour of her room she was accepting their choice again. She went out to meet Ravi. Ravi talked with her nicely. He kept discussing everything. Then they both went to cafe like they did every day since childhood. But this time she felt that it was different. While discussing many things Ravi suggested “ Dipti you must concentrate on your singing. I like it.” She smiled. She loved to sing but while doing painting she totally forgot about it. She showed him pictures she painted. He admired them little bit. But still he kept discussing her singing. He even suggested that she should sing a song for her. She nodded happily. She never sang in public place like cafe. But on that day he encouraged her so much that she started singing there. People around her started listening her. Finally when her song was over, they clapped for her. She was so happy. She felt that Ravi was best person for her. He was truly in love with her. He encouraged her. He showed proper route to her for her career. Then she started discussing about her internet friends. He even admired it. She told about some boys on Internet too. He didn’t show any jealousy. She began to feel that he would give her freedom. She was so thirsty for freedom. She wanted someone who would love her & admired her that she jumped at his every word like puppy. She was not in love with him. But she began to feel that she was falling in love with him. She decided to concentrate on her singing. She promised him that she would start singing daily. On that day while returning home she purchased many things which helped singer to learn singing. She decided that her career as singer must began. She knew that she could do it.
When Dipti returned home, she told her Mom that Ravi was nice boy. Her Mom smiled but her Mom was confused too. It was clear that her Mom didn’t understand sudden change of heart. She showed box of chocolates which Ravi gave her. She began to talk how much he admired her singing. She told Mom that she needed a teacher to become singer. Her Mom looked confused. Her Mom “ But your Dad don’t like singing.” “ But Ravi advised to learn singing?” Mom looked shocked “ But do you asked your Dad?!” She never thought about it. She always thought that her Dad would agree with Ravi. She felt confused. Dipti decided to ask for permission. She went to Dad. Then she cleared her throat & asked “ Can I learn singing?” Her Dad gave angry look. Dad“So you want to perform on stage now? Is it your new hobby?” Dipti felt so nervous. She didn’t understand what was right. She smiled nervously & said “ No..no I just want to sing in house. I mean spiritual songs etc.” suddenly her Dad started to look happy. Her Dad wanted her to act with devotion. She supposed to talk carefully. She wanted to learn singing to please Ravi but she didn’t want to appear modern. It was so confusing. She wanted to look normal. She didn’t want to hurt reputation of her family. She knew her Dad hated people who did public performance. She didn’t plan to argue with family. She was not so much interested. She just wanted to sing for Ravi. She knew one thing that Ravi liked her & she wanted to impress him. She began to think that she started to like him too. She went in room. She laughed. She was so happy. Finally she got boyfriend. She wanted to keep one. But her Dad never permitted. Her whole family seemed against it. She then sensed that she didn’t actually wanted to keep boyfriend. It was wrong. But when her Dad permitted friendship with Ravi. She started chatting on mobile. She kept calling him. Sometimes he took call & sometimes she was not getting response. But she started singing. Then one day her education was completed. She was not so sure that Ravi was in love with her. But her father kept insisting. Ravi began to plan his life in different style. She didn’t like it that much. But still she began to adjust. She felt that she was in love too. Actually she knew Ravi & she wanted to settle with known person. Her Dad kept admiring Ravi. She kept agreeing. Then one day finally they decided to talk about marriage. But Ravi was not interested. She felt so sad. Most importantly her Dad’s admiration was vanished. She started searching for job. But it was not easy. Actually she wanted to sing. She decided to give audition & she got one chance. It was not big payment but she took it anyway. Her father threw fit of anger. Her father insisted that she needed to stop otherwise she would remain unmarried. She suddenly began to feel that she didn’t want to marry at all. She was not in love with anyone. Since when Ravi stopped visiting her she began to feel happy. She sensed that she wanted his support just because she wanted to sing. She stopped painting totally. One day when she started cleaning her room, she looked towards a corner. It had lots of canvas. She began to look towards paintings. She suddenly started to feel that she wanted to hang them all. She began to put nail on every wall. She began to hang paintings. She started laughing happily. She began to feel so happy when she began to hang paintings. Her Mom came running in room by noise. Her Mom was shocked when she saw Dipti hanged paintings in such way. When her Mom tried to touch it, she began to scream. She didn’t let anyone remove them. Her father was angry. But she was not scared of him anymore. She just wanted those paintings to be hanged. Her father told her Mom angrily “ She started losing her mind let us take her to some psychiatrist.” Her Mom looked nervous. Her brother just said “ Dad is right. She need help...she is turning crazy day by day.” Her Mom tried to calm down her. She cried for long time. Then her Mom decided to talk with their Doctor. Doctor heard everything then he suggested a psychiatrist. Her Mom wrote number. Then Mom took appointment. Dipti didn’t say anything. She began to feel that she was truly a useless creature. She wanted to kill herself but she knew that even it was not easy. She might come just handicap & it would be worst. She heard lot of stories like that. She kept telling herself that her Mom would help her. She kept working like robot whole time. But she kept watching carefully no one would remove those paintings. Luckily her father & brother didn’t have much interest in her. Except her father kept blaming her singing for all. She was feeling so confused. She began to think that she should have sticked to painting only. It was sad but she began to feel that Psychiatrist might say same thing. Psychiatrist might say that singing was her big mistake. She tried to stop singing. She kept just sleeping on bed for hours. She began to get so lazy. She didn’t want to move. Her father kept taunting & abusing while her brother kept ignoring her. Her Mom was only one who was concerned. She kept trying to paint but it was not working too. She began to think singing was her big mistake. She needed to find something else. But she was so sad. She couldn’t find a way out.
Finally Dipti went for appointment. She waited while feeling tense. She kept thinking hopefully. She started to get restless. She kept watching time. She just wanted to get over with it. She felt so happy when finally Psychiatrist called her inside. Psychiatrist started asking questions & she answered them all. She finally asked “ Do you feel falling in love with Ravi was my mistake?” Psychiatrist smiled “ You were never in love with him. You just liked him since he wanted you to sing. You wanted to sing. You covered those walls with canvas since you don’t want to see that colour which was forced on you. You don’t want career that forced or colour of room that was forced. But you keep adjusting since you want people to admire you.” She didn’t say anything since she began to sense it was true. Psychiatrist turned to her Mom. Psychiatrist “ Why don’t you repaint her room? & let her sing? You can do it if you decide.” Her Mom nodded with determination. When they went home her Mom argued. Finally her Dad gave up but not without abusing & declaring that he was doing favour by feeding them. But still they kept taking same stand. Dipti managed to get nice chance of singing. Her Mom encouraged. Dipti started singing. Then her Mom repainted her room. She began to feel so nice. Her father was abusing but she didn’t care anymore. She was happy since she was singing. She didn’t paint anymore. How hard she tried her paintings couldn’t become great & her singing always remained great. She kept singing without thought. Soon she started to smile once again the way she used to.
The End
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