Thoughts of night
Rita was sleeping peacefully. She was happy about entire life. It was perfect. Nothing was wrong. She was totally sure about it. She told herself that she could sleep peacefully to night. She was happy about it. She was so upset & tense. She didn't understand why. She knew that she didn't have any problems. She took deep breath. She didn't understand why she couldn't sleep. It was very common to sleep. She knew that she could sleep peacefully. In fact she must sleep peacefully. Nothing was wrong with her life. She got good job. Her wonderful husband was sleeping next to her. Her kids were sleeping in next room. All was perfect. She started remembering her entire life. She sensed every thing was normal. She didn't recall any trouble. She worked so hard to remember it. But she sensed that she never suffered trouble. She took deep breath. She didn't understand what was wrong with her. She looked around in darkness. She began to calculate her entire day. She knew that everything was perfect. But she was unhappy. Then she looked towards sleeping figure of her husband. Rohit! He was nice man but he never helped her in her household work. She was not complete housewife. She was running shop. But it was not giving that much return. She felt that it might be cause due to which she was feeling upset. She was working on each day as maid too. She was not getting appreciated. She was not admired by any one. She began to count her profits. They were not that much. She was wanted to earn big profit. She knew that Rohit didn't give her respect she deserves. Then she slowly began to think about her two kids. She was so confused about their affection to her. She knew that they acted sweetly with her. But she was not sure what they felt. She began to recount what her daughter did on her birthday. It was fifteen birthday of Priya. Rita was arranging everything for her. She was planning a normal party but suddenly Priya came home from her tuition & began to ask about arrangements of her birthday. Rita was shocked. But she controlled herself. Rita began to tell her how did she was planning to cook birthday cake with her hand. Rita always used to do that until that day Priya never complaint. It was their wonderful chocolate cake. They used to decorate it with toffees. It was always just two of them. Priya used to love it. Priya was elder daughter then her son Raghu was born. So from childhood Priya was little bit insecure so on her birthday it was just two of them. Rohit used to take Raghu away with him. But that day Priya started suddenly planning something different. " Mom I want big birthday! My friends were having those big birthday parties. Mom I want one!" She was so confused. She didn't plan for it. It clearly showed need of extra budget. It was upsetting. She didn't have it. She said " I need to call your Dad.."Priya suddenly screamed on her " If you need to call Dad for everything what is your use? Can't you arrange party on your own?" This was shocking statement to her. She knew that her daughter was immature. But still her daughter was considering her just an object was so stressful. She never sensed that her daughter was changed so much. She was little angel to her. Rita took deep breath & said " What did you want?" " I want some fancy things." Then Priya did big list. Rita did budget. After that Rita was just her budget manager in birthday. Rita never felt as if she was part of birthday. She knew that if she did this for Priya then Raghu would demand same thing. She did it for Raghu too. She was feeling so angry. She was no longer part of her children's birthday. It was not right. She needed to become part but they didn't want her. They wanted just money. She began to feel so angry. She looked towards Rohit. She began to feel rise of anger inside her. She didn't like the way he was sleeping. He used her as maid. She was nothing but just maid for him. Today even her children treated her that way. She was nothing but a dust! They didn't respect her at all. She felt so upset. She started looking around in darkness. She could see that she couldn't see what was next to her. She was upset by all. She looked around & sensed just darkness. Her entire life was dark. She wanted to find hope. She soon began to feel that she was not truely happy. She was pretending to be happy. She started to cry. She knew that she was so lonely. Her entire life was just darkness. She wanted to feel happy in it. Her entire room was so dark. It was representing her life. She was so alone & upset. She didn't understand her true feelings until now but now she could sense them. She could sense that darkness. She didn't want to feel so depressed. She tried to close her eyes & sleep but nothing was working. She was restless & upset. She was shivering. She knew that this night was going to kill her. She never felt that way before. It was so upsetting. She didn't want to feel that way. She wanted to feel normal & happy. She didn't understand why she was feeling so upset. She knew that something was wrong in her life. She decided that she was not going to give like this before her sorrows. She was going to stay strong. But something went wrong. She started crying. She kept crying. She looked at watch it was midnight. She was still crying & no one seemed to care. She sensed one thing that as she was not happy. She began to think ways to get out of this mess. She began to regret her marriage. She began to regret every step she took in life. She started to feel so upset. She began to feel frustration in life that there was darkness. She looked in room. She was sensing as if something was in room. She didn't understand what was it. She tried to calm herself. It was so upsetting. She didn't want to feel pain in her soul but she was feeling so stressed. She looked around in room. She was in darkness. She was feeling so much fear inside her soul. She began to sense that her life was so horrible. She kept crying. She couldn't able to sleep since she was not happy. She knew that she was feeling so stressful. She started crying in her pillow. It was her worst night.
When Rita wake up next morning, she was feeling sick. Her head was too heavy. She knew that it was due to last night's crying. She could sense it. She was not feeling healthy. She needed to sleep. But she was not that depressed. She felt that her illness was just due to her lack of sleep. If she managed to sleep she could feel happy. She convinced herself that it was just for a day. She was so sure now that everything was going to be fine. She even received message from one customer appreciating her product. She felt as if she was becoming famous day by day. She was so upset on yesterday night but today she felt as if everything was perfect. She talked with Rohit nicely. But she sensed that he was not interested. She felt upset. She said " What happened? Are you not interested in talking with me?" Rohit looked nervous. He sensed that she was upset. It was clear that he felt guilty. She was so happy. It showed that he loved him. He came near her. He was about to kiss when suddenly kids appeared in kitchen door. Their romantic movement was lost. He took his bag & went to office. She gave small smile & began to arrange all. She did all her household chores then she went to her job. She liked her job. She looked around everything was fine. She didn't understand why everything was looking so upsetting in night. She smiled at that idea. She began to feel that night was her worst enemy. Everything seemed so perfect in day. She worked happily. Then she went home. They had nice peaceful dinner. Priya was not complaining about anything. In fact Priya admired her cooking again & again. Raghu was busy in his own world. He didn't bother any one. So Rita went to sleep on her usual time. She said " Good night" to Rohit. She felt that everything was just perfect. She didn't miss anything. Soon she began to hear peaceful breathing of Rohit in his sleep while she was moving in her bed in restless fashion. She didn't understand why she needed to suffer like this. She wanted peaceful sleep. But she was not getting it. She was feeling so upset. She didn't understand why she needed to suffer like this. She deserved happiness. She worked so hard whole day. She needed to get some rest. But she was not getting any sleep. She suddenly felt that she might needed to do some exercise. She might get some sleep after it. She was so stressed. She wanted to relax. She wanted to feel happy. She started to look around. She couldn't see any hope. She knew that this room would become her cage so she just went out. She started to feel so stressed. She just walked out of her room. She went in hall. She felt so happy for few movements. She felt as if all her troubles where vanished. She smiled. She saw TV. She began to feel that she could watch some late night show. She started TV. She was so sure that everything was going to be perfect. She began to search for some nice show. She didn't like those shows. She always thought that in night they would keep some interesting horror show or something which would entertain her. She was even ready to watch some cartoon. But she was just one movie which was totally useless in her eyes. She couldn't find anything interesting. Suddenly she began to sense darkness in her thought again. She began to think about her day. She was trying to remember positive thoughts. But she suddenly remembered how did Rohit went away from her. She began to sense that he didn't come near her again. She began to doubt his intentions. She started to feel that he might not truely wanted to come near her. He was just pretending. He managed to create excuse by using presence of their children. He was not truely interested in her. She began to feel so angry. She started to imagine his girlfriends. She suddenly began to remember all colleagues of his office party. She saw many beautiful ladies who were running around him. At that moment she just ignored it. But now it all started to look important. She began to imagine his other life. She suddenly shivered with emotion by that possibility. It was easily possible that he had other life where he was enjoying company of other women. She was so sure. She stood up. She decided that she needed proof. She needed to prove that he had affair. She needed justice. She needed to tell about it to all world. He did wrong thing. He cheated her. It was not right. She knew it surely now. She was planning to fight back. She began to plan. She started to think about ways. Then she remembered cupboard. She began to search it. She took out keys without noise. Then she kept searching. She started removing shirts. She checked pockets. Then she felt that he might wake up so she once again went to sleep. She was so upset & angry. She closed her eyes. She was thinking about him & his cheating. She started to concentrate on just that thought. She didn't understand when she managed to fall asleep. She woke up next morning. She looked at time. She was on time. She felt as if she just needed to find out his truth then her entire trouble would vanish. She would get full freedom. She wanted to sleep properly & she knew that she could sleep when she would find evidence. She went in kitchen with full confidence. She looked around. Ronit was sitting in kitchen like innocent man. But she knew that he had affair. She was totally sure about it. He smiled towards her but she ignored it. She knew that she needed to pretend but she couldn't. Then he slowly came near her & said " I am sorry. I know I am neglected you too much. This is due to extra work.." she didn't say anything. She knew what was his extra work. He smiled & said " Soon this project will be over then we will plan second honeymoon. I planned all. Remember once I use to plan all for us!" She nodded. She didn't understand how could he pretend so much. But then she felt that he might be in love with them both. She didn't want to lose him so she nodded slowly. She knew that she needed to find out his truth. She needed to break her imagination.
Rohit was sensing that something was wrong. He didn't mention it but he could see dark circles under Rita's eyes. He didn't understand cause. Yesterday he noticed worst thing. He woke up use washroom & he saw she was sitting in hall. She was looking like some ghost in that light. She had strange anger on her face. He felt as if she was talking to herself. He didn't understand what he supposed to do. He was so confused. He decided to discuss this with his Mom. He called Mom & told her all slowly. Mom " I don't like this. She must be having some mental problem!" " Mental problem?" " It could be any thing. You know schizophrenia or paranoid disorder.. there are many mental illness! I read about them in newspaper article! She is talking to herself so she is seeing someone who is not standing before her. She is imagining person who doesn't exist." He took deep breath. This genuinely managed to scare him. It was so upsetting. He couldn't believe that she was mad. It was so upsetting. She looked perfect. But still she was mad. She was so confident about her job & home. He needed to convince her to go to psychiatrist. He knew that he loved her. He would never leave her. If she needed special attention then they might send kids to hostel. Next year his daughter was planning to join some college which was out of town so she was going in hostel. Then another thought shiverd him. They said that such sickness were genetic. He was so scared. He didn't want it to happen to Priya. He felt so tense. He decided that he must took Rita to psychiatrist. He was sure about it. He decided to take day off from office that day. He knew that his Boss might get upset but it didn't matter to him. He knew that his family was precious to him. He couldn't survive without family. He took day off & went home. Rita was in her shop. She was busy when Rohit told her that he wanted to have candle light dinner with her in hotel. She was shocked. She sensed that something was wrong. She began to feel that he was planning something. She knew that he wanted to throw her out of his way. But she didn't know how. She was scared to think about ways with which he could do it. She began to feel so angry. She immediately went out of shop. She took Taxi & went home. She was first to enter in home. She was not sure where he was planning their dinner. But she didn't want to go out with him. She felt that something was wrong with it. Then he came. He told her about five star hotel table he reserved for them. He was feeling so happy about it. He was smiling so much. But he knew that when they would come to true subject all would change. She wouldn't smile towards him. He tried to console himself. But it was not working. He could see her anger. He didn't understand why did she felt so angry. He didn't hurt her in any way. Then finally he went in his room. He sensed that someone managed to check his cupboard. It was shocking. He didn't understand. Then he felt that Rita might be searching something. He just took out Rita's favourite clothes. He wanted her to be happy with him. Then they went to hotel. She was observing him angrily. He didn't want to discuss that subject. He tried to avoid in beginning but then after one limit . He started discussing. She screamed loudly on him " You want to prove me mad for some woman who you like. How could you?!" He was so shocked. He didn't understand which woman. But before he could say anything she threw hot soup towards him. He felt burn. He was so shocked. He screamed. Hotel staff came running. Rita came back to her senses too. She began to threw water on his burns. But there was no option. They went to Doctor. He was given treatment. Luckily it was painful but not so risky. After it she didn't have much option. Her mother-in-law began to call her mad on her face. She started crying. Doctor was watching all this. Doctor suggested calmly " You have anger problem clearly why don't you visit psychiatrist?" She nodded. From there she went to reception & took appointment of psychiatrist. Rohit's Mom started claiming that she should stay away from him. Mom " She burnt you with intention! Entire hotel is saying it!" Kids started looking at Rita accusingly. Rohit laughed. " Mom they didn't see it properly people just love to gossip. We had big argument. She was so angry that she stood up & table lost balance due to her standing. No doubt she was careless. But she didn't threw it." Kids looked relaxed. Priya added " Such things happen sometimes." Rita started crying while apologising. " I did with anger. All my mistake." Rohit came near her. He tried to console her. Soon they both went to psychiatrist. They told all. Rohit finally shared his fears. She told all psychiatrist without hiding anything. Psychiatrist started laughing when Rohit mentioned Schizophrenia. Psychiatrist " She is fine! She is just suffering from insomnia. It is disorder regarding sleep. If a human being didn't sleep for long time then brain started to create stories for entertainment. She needed to sleep or she needed to know how she supposed to handle herself on that moment." " I was sleeping for few days." " You were not. I can look at your eyes & tell." " I was sleeping..." " For how many hours two or three?!" She didn't say anything. She just kept quiet. Rohit was so shocked. Rohit " My God you never told me that!" " I don't want to disturb you." Psychiatrist " She didn't sleep during that time her mind started creating stories." Rohit looked so nervous. " So can you cure it?" " Sure!" Psychiatrist smiled & said " Don't worry." Rohit nodded. She began to feel relaxed. Slowly Psychiatrist began to teach her how to handle her sleepless nights. She began to learn how to handle her trouble & create positive even out of it.
The End
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