Sarika's crying
Sarika was so
happy. She was going to her favorite college. It was her favorite since all her
friends were going in it. She wanted to go in college with them. She needed to
think positively about everything her mom kept telling her that she must get
over her shyness. She was feeling so negative due to her thoughts. But she
didn’t understand how could she feel positive. She looked towards herself in
mirror. She felt her reflection looked great in mirror but sadly people didn’t
feel that way. She always got criticized for her every action. She didn’t
understand why she didn’t impress anyone. She began to choose her dresses. She
knew that she needed to prepare herself in best way for college. She needed to
select those dresses which would impress people & began to make everything
positive for her. Sarika started to choose them. She saw different color that
showed unique impacts. She needed to find suitable colors but she knew that her
every color had some concept which didn’t suit. Whenever she touched any dress
from cupboard, she began to remember what her friends told about them. She started to get
restless. She began to feel nervous. She didn’t understand what was right &
what was wrong. Her mind was no longer positive about all. She looked towards
her dress carefully. She began to feel that she needed to go for shopping. She
called her mom loudly. Mom came immediately. Mom “What happened?” “Mom these
dresses are not enough.” Mom began to look inside cupboard. Her Mom began to
feel confused too. There were many dresses which looked good but still they
might be not suitable for college. Mom slowly said “We might buy some more but
this is also good collection.” She gave frustrating look to mom. She knew that
she had so many dresses. She couldn’t just waste them. She slowly said “Mom I
will wear these dresses when I went to market or other occasions but for
college I need different dress.” Her mom agreed. But her mom was not much
happy. Mom didn’t like this waste. Her mom still nodded. Mom said in slow voice
“For making good impression in college you might need few dresses. But you need
to be careful about budget.” “Don’t worry Mom I will handle all carefully.” Mom
slowly took out one card & gave her. Mom “This one has limited money. You
need to spend carefully.” “Don’t worry mom everything will be with reasonable
price. I will buy all on discount.” Mom nodded but Sarika knew that mom didn’t
like this idea. Still Sarika took that card. She needed to go for shopping. It
was such pleasant thought.
Sarika was
feeling so nervous. She went in shops to choose dresses. But when she began to choose,
she started to look towards every dress very carefully. She once again started
to remember comments of friends & relatives. She began to feel so nervous.
She just started to feel sick. She didn’t understand what was happening to her.
She was okay when she entered in market. But now she was feeling sick. She
decided that she needed to sit somewhere & relax. She began to search for
some coffee shop or restaurant. She looked around. She found one burger joint.
She immediately went in it. She ordered one Lemonade & one sandwich. She
was not certain that she could eat them. She was feeling so sick but she needed
to sit so she ordered. Then she called her mom. “Mom I am feeling so uneasy.”
She said this in low voice. She didn’t want others to sense that she was sick.
They might throw her out of there. Her thoughts were turning in worst way. She
began to imagine people's reaction towards her sickness. Then she began to feel
more nervous. She didn’t want to get sick before people. She told Mom
immediately where she was. Mom “I can come there in few seconds just don’t
worry stay there.” “Okay mom. Come as soon as possible.” Her mom immediately
disconnected her call. She began to look towards door. She was so scared. She
wanted her mom to come soon. Every second seemed like year to her. She was
feeling so nervous in her stomach. Her head was paining too much. She began to
confirm that she didn’t have fever. But her forehead seemed normal to her. She
began to wait for her mom with full anxiety. She needed her. Then finally her
mom came in. She began to feel so relaxed. She began to feel totally normal.
She didn’t understand how could she managed to get well so soon. She kept
looking nervously towards Mom. She said slowly “Mom I am feeling fine now.” Mom
smiled & said “That’s great! Let’s eat something.” She nodded & she
immediately started eating. She began to enjoy her food. She was so hungry. She
didn’t understand how could her health change so much in few seconds but it
did. She felt so happy. She smiled sweetly. She began to get so restless when
she noticed that other customers were looking towards her in strange way. Then
she heard one customer also talking slowly “That girl is strange. She was
pretending as if she was sick for some time now, she is healthy again. Why she
did that?” Other person on that table said in frustrated voice “We need to mind
our own business. Let’s talk about our personal problems. Just forget about
her.” Sarika looked angrily towards them. She was so upset. She was not
pretending but she was okay now. Her mom said “Don’t pay attention to such
people. You are feeling okay that’s great. Let me order something for me too.
Then we will go for shopping.” Sarika
smiled & nodded. She was feeling so happy. She was healthy too. She decided
that her mom was right. Her health was okay so they just needed to enjoy this
moment. She began to enjoy her food once again.
Sarika went
back home. She decided that she didn’t need to go for shopping. On that time,
she looked towards her mobile. Her friends were not calling her. She was going
in that college with her all friends. But now her friends were not calling her.
She began to feel so lonely. She slowly looked towards her mom. She said “Mom
no one called me.” “Come on. They must be busy. You can call them.” Sarika
nodded but she was feeling so confused. She knew that when she called her
friends most of the time, they didn’t talk nicely with her. They considered her
call as some issue. She kept calling them & tried to treat it as positive.
But she didn’t want to call any of them & disturb them. She felt so disturbed.
She knew that she was hurt. She decided to go in that college for her friends
but now she was not certain that her friends wanted to be with her. She was
feeling so scared. Her positive thoughts were vanishing. She decided to call
her friend. She started to call them one by one. But in every call, she felt
negativity. Finally, one friend called her & said “I will message you
timing when you suppose to meet us on college door now stop calling others. You
are disturbing all. We all need to prepare for college. You need to understand.
You can’t just keep irritating everyone.” She began to feel so sad. She started
to think about all. It was not going in right way. She was certain about it. She
began to feel so hopeful when she got this admission but now everything was
shattered. Her friends were not acting in good way. She was so confused. She
began to feel scared. She didn’t want to cry but she started crying. She was feeling
so upset. She couldn’t control her crying. Her mom came running. Her mom
started asking her questions. But she couldn’t answer any of them. She just
kept crying. Finally, her mom decided to call Doctor. Her mom just didn’t understand
how to control her crying. Her doctor suggested emergency appointment with
psychiatrist. Her mom immediately took it without any second. Her mom called
her dad later about it. Her dad also wanted to join them but it was not possible.
Her mom took her to psychiatrist. Whole time she was crying. When she reached
there, she wanted to control her tears for such a long time but it didn’t work.
Finally, she went inside. Psychiatrist started talking to her. She couldn’t
control her crying for sometime but then slowly she began to control it.
Psychiatrist's calm voice managed to do it. She began to tell how did her friends
acted. Then slowly Psychiatrist asked her cause. She looked towards her mom nervously.
Psychiatrist told her mom to go out. Then Psychiatrist asked her “What
happened?” “I talked about my love towards one boy to my one friend. That friend
told it to another. That boy heard about it. He became so upset. He told to his
mom. One day I went to his birthday party. His mom told me before all that I
need to stay away from her son & concentrate on studies. After that all
friends began to avoid me. Now I am so scared to find new one & old one
didn’t like me.” Step by step Psychiatrist told her about handling this
situation. Then her mom came inside. Psychiatrist didn’t talk about her secret
just said that it was nervous break down due to entering in college. Her mom
nodded. She began her treatment that day. She went in college but she kept away
from her old friends & that boy. She just concentrated on her studies.
Slowly her life started to move ahead in normal way. Her old friends lost
interest in her & they became certain that she wouldn’t irritate them. Next
year she selected new friends. She didn’t able to settle even in that friend circle
since her old friends managed to talk about her. But she didn’t care. It was
just about some years since on next year she took different course. She managed
to start her different career. But she never forgot her that experience. She
even talked about it when she decided to marry. But her to be husband just joked
on it. Then he told her to invite psychiatrist on marriage. She nodded. By then
her treatment was over. She sent invitation on email. Psychiatrist congratulated
her but wrote that he couldn’t come due to busy schedule. She was disappointed but
she knew that it was impossible for doctor to go on every patient’s function.
She just thanked doctor & said bye. Her life remained normal after it. She
always felt thankful for doctor’s treatment. Her life was normal due to it.
The End
